Chapter 21: Confessions

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POV Gulf

Watching Mew in that state drove Gulf to an almost panic attack.

He had never seen Mew like that.

He thought about getting a bucket, but he didn't want to leave Mew alone. What if he started chocking? Was he even awake? Gulf didn't know. Gulf could feel his heartbeat pounding through Mew's back as he softly caressed him. Trying to get his hair out of the way, Gulf noticed Mew's skin was soaked in sweat. Gulf just listened as the vomiting ended and just as Gulf was starting to get to his feet to help him, Mew started sobbing.

- Oh... P'Mew... - Gulf whispered not knowing what to do.

Gulf got onto the bed once again and hugged Mew's body from behind the best he could.

- It's ok Phi... I'm here. You're here. Nothing can hurt you anymore... - Gulf kissed Mew's soaked shoulder and the back of his neck as tears flowed his eyes.

What's the extent of his pain?

Gulf felt heartbroken for him, and angry. Angry at anyone that had hurt that amazing man.

Were all his nightmares like this? Was he always like this? Going through it alone?

Mew started trying to pull away from him and ducked his head. He wanted to hide from Gulf.

- Let's get a shower, ok? - Gulf said softly while grabbing Mew's arm, trying to get him to get up - A shower will make you feel better.

Mew hung his head and looked at the floor where he had puked minutes ago.

- I will clean that, don't worry - Gulf said - It's ok. It doesn't bother me.

Gulf got Mew up from the bed and threw an arm around his shoulders, helping him walk to the bathroom. His body was still shaking. Gulf was feeling sad, angry, and confused.

Keep it together Gulf. He needs you.

When they got to the bathroom, Gulf turned the lights on and helped Mew to get out of his pajamas. Mew didn't say a thing. He just stared blankly to his front. He went to the sink and brushed his teeth in silence. Gulf just watched him, holding back the tears.

Gulf went to the shower and got the water running, waiting until the water turned warm. When the water got to the perfect temperature, Gulf moved to Mew's back and kiss his back.

- The water's ready. Will you be ok alone? - he asked.

Mew nodded slowly.

- The floor... - Mew rasped.

- I'll take care of that. Don't worry.

Mew nodded again and stepped inside the shower. He went silent again.

Gulf took the clothes from the floor and put them in the laundry basket. He went to the kitchen and looked for supplies to clean the bedroom floor. The cleanup wasn't bad, he did it in a few minutes. He knew how ashamed Mew had been with that, so Gulf wanted the puke gone by the time he got out of the bathroom.

After he was done, he went to the bathroom again. The shower was still running.

- P'Mew? - Gulf stepped inside and pulled the curtain back a bit to peer inside - Are you ok?

Mew was standing under the water, just letting it run over his head. Gulf could still see his body tremble, and he held back the urge to go to him and hug him.

- Are you finished? - Gulf asked.

- I need a towel - Mew finally spoke again.

Gulf turned and looked for a towel in a little closet beside the sink.

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