the book of random things to randomly read

CHAPTER 1,page 1

One day Billy was going to play his trumpet...then he decided to play basket ball instead! Unfortuately, he decided to play *the farting game*. His fart reeked so bad... that he actually killed a skunk with his fart and then ran over the skunk with his skateboard. Then he started singing the peanut buter jelly song then he went home and was chilling on the sofa eating chilli and playing video game on his phone when suddenly... BING BANG BOOM CRASSSHHHH!!! Hargburger came in the room with a wig "whats up!!" she yelled and threw a plate of spagetti at billy and and so Billy threw his chilli and they began a food fight when bob came into the room with his bike and he rode it for the first time and fell over on his bottom because he was in love for the first time with Billy.Then, steve was all dramatic about a new event that was happening in fire town were it was alway catching on fire by lighting because people always liked to juggle with metal balls. And when he got to town fire a giant dog ate steve up. And the mayor mr.Thingamabob came out seeing steve being digested by a dog yelled "oh no! i ran out of delicious creamy choclate cake!" and he ran to the store and half way their he got swooped up by a eagle and the eagle named yo mama fed the mayor to her children. But it was turning 12:00 and everyone knows that when it is 12:00 that everybody has to hop on one leg and throw pies to death at the first random person they see so every one started throwing pies at whootseewhatsee and if you are getting pied to death then you have to sing the song "im so stupid by ellynelly556." after whootseewhatsee was pied to death everyone stoped their little pie reunion because it was already 1:00 and thats when you have to stop throwing pies and hopping on one leg. WARNING:IF YOU DON'T DO ANY OF THESE THING YOU WILL BE FORCED TO LIVE IN A PILE OF GARBAGE IN JAIL IN YOUR MISSERABLE CELL FOR 5000 YEARS AND YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO TALK FOR THE ENTIRE TIME...........