There'll Be Storms (Spanking Story)

Chapter 37

ERYK'S POV:

I need some sleep. Glancing at the clock for the third time tonight, it was 3:38 a.m. and I could hear every intense ticking of the hand. I dug my self into a hole with Charlie after asking if I could use my phone, and it resulted in him extending my grounding. The separation of my phone combined with yesterday's practice exam made my head fuzzy. I haven't talked to Natalie in almost three days. I can only imagine the amount of notifications on my phone.

Hearing a groan from Cody, I tossed around in a my bed for a few minutes before getting up and walking over to the window. Usually whenever I had a hard time sleeping at the old house I would sneak out and go for a run. Jeff always passed out drunk so he never heard me but I'm pretty sure Charlie would notice, he has ears like a hawk. He could hear me drop a bag of cotton balls I swear!

"Ugh." I rubbed my hands over my face.

I turned around and saw that the light in the hallway was still out, there was no sign that either Charlie or Cody were awake. I opened the window and climbed out onto the porch eave where I would sometimes sit when I came here on weekends. It was pitch black outside but there was some light provided by the moon that sat just slightly above the elm tree ahead of me. Man, there isn't anything I wouldn't do for a cigarette right now. It's funny how cathartic a smoke can be every once in a while...but hey, it usually gets the job done for me.

"What're you doing?" Charlie stuck his head out the window, giving me a heart attack in the process.

"Christ Charlie." I leaned back and took a deep breath. "I know I'm not supposed to be out here and if you're going to punish me, please just give me five more minutes?" I asked sincerely, I wasn't ready to let go just yet.

"Having a hard time sleeping again?" He did something extremely surprising...he crawled out the window himself and joined me.

"Yep, nothing new." I moved aside to give him room to sit comfortably.

"Anything on your mind?" He leaned forward with his elbows on his knees and folded his hands in front of him.

I let out a snide smile, is there anything on my mind?

"Is there anything on my mind?" I repeated back to him. "Well, maybe just that I can't seem to stop disappointing you. Maybe that I'm losing sight of ever having a functional life because of everything that is wrong with me. Maybe because everyone always talks about Jeff and then I instantly get that picture of my mother with a bullet in her chest. Maybe I feel like I'm constantly suffocating because I'm trying to look out for Cody. Maybe, just maybe, those are the few things on my mind that are causing my insomnia."

He looked taken back by my assertion towards him, but in my defense he asked. I wonder what it is about that one simple question, usually in the form of "are you okay?", that just makes a person release all of their troubles.

"Sorry." I said after his silence. "I'm just tired of hiding the pain... all these places and these faces are getting old."

"You feel like you've seen all you can see?" He asked to which I nodded.

"It's like these people, this town is nothing but a giant cesspool of my misery."

He sat there silently, just casually listening to me continue with my rant of everything that I've kept to myself for so long.

"I can't even visit mom's grave to see "In loving memory of..." because there is no loving memory... it's all about him! It's either everyone is obsessed with learning about him or they're obsessed with hating him. So I'm terrified of those four words."

He shook his head, noticing his face becoming bright I shot him a look of concern to which he reciprocated a confused one.

"Are you okay?" I asked now.

"I'm so sorry Eryk, I've been very absent in this subject because I...well I just don't know what to do. I loved your mom so much and I failed her in every way that a person could have failed someone." He took a deep breath and in this instant I realized the weight that he had on his shoulders.

I didn't mean to bring her up..." I tried to angle my pain elsewhere for his sake.

"Don't say that. I encourage you to always express your feelings, especially to me because I want to know everything that could help me in helping you. Never, ever hide them from me or anyone else. I am determined to improve your state, even if only by a little because I want you to live your life to your fullest potential."

"To my fullest potential? Everything I've done so far seems to be squashing my potential." I shrugged my shoulders and looked out towards the elm tree.

"Eryk, I know I'm very hard on you but that's only because I want the absolute best for you. My biggest fear is failing you as I have failed your mother, so I'm sorry if I ever made you doubt your way of thinking or..."

"I think you got me all wrong." I interrupted. "I don't regret the life I chose for me or what was given to me...I just feel like everything is moving to fast and I...I just can't catch a break." I whispered.

He nodded, giving me a small smile which probably indicates that this is how life always is but he recognized the strain in my voice. "Eryk, I think it's safe to surmise there'll be storms sometimes, but you will see eventually where your destination stands."

"Thanks Charlie," I laughed a little. "that's very vague but it's slightly comforting."

"Come back inside, I have something that may help you sleep."

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ERYK'S POV:

I abruptly woke up and immediately noticed that the entire house seemed quiet. Too quiet. I looked over and saw that Cody wasn't in his bed and that it was folded perfectly. Glancing at my alarm clock, I felt a wave of shock hit me when my mind processed that it was after noon. I haven't slept this long since...well I don't think I'v ever slept this long. I'm going to have to keep a bottle of NyQuil Charlie gave me last night on-hand because it works wonders.

I opened the bedroom door and heard some talking downstairs, Cody and Charlie were probably about to sit down and enjoy lunch. Realizing how hungry I was, I changed quickly and rushed downstairs to see what was behind that faint smell of butter and bread.

"Look who's finally awake." Cody said instantly as I walked into the kitchen. "I thought you were dead."

I shielded my eyes from the bright light shining down above the table and took a seat in my usual spot.

"Yeah, yeah, I slept in." I looked towards Charlie, who seemed to be hiding the pain we discussed last night extremely well.

"Slept in? You were passed out, talking in your sleep and you snored like a hog." He ridiculed. "I was about to call a priest."

"Quiet." I smacked the back of his head a little before opening the fridge to find the orange juice or at least some milk.

"You be quiet." He threw the tie from the bread bag at me.

"Okay, let's sit down and have some lunch. We all have a big decision to talk about." Charlie put down a pot of stew and handed us each a turkey sandwich.

"A big decision? Is it whether or not we send Eryk to a church?"

I shot him a mocking smug.

"No. I wasn't going to tell either of you but after recent events," He looked towards me this time. "I think we should seriously consider it."

I glanced at Cody, recognizing the burning agony that was coursing through our brains as Charlie was deliberately stalling.

"A few weeks ago I got a job offer and I was going to refuse because it's...it's in another state. So the decision is whether or not we move to Pennsylvania."

Moving? To another house? Another city, another state. Where's the NyQuil? I feel like I need to sleep for another ten hours.