"So," Dream says, throwing me plain diamond armour and a diamond axe. We're in some abandoned plains. "Let me teach you some PVP tricks."

"I don't need them," I say, and start smacking the green man on my screen. He yelps and laughs it off, hitting me back. "You see, chat"—hit—"Dream said"—hit—"that he'll give me $100"—hit—"if I can beat him one time! I did it! Somebody clip that."

My chat starts screaming POGCHAMP at me which feels really good. What also feels really good is that I'm about to get a $100 donation from a world record holder. Haha, suck it, Dream.

"I can't believe you just did that," he mutters, some amusement in his voice.

"Just because I'm a nice person doesn't mean I can't beat you up, Dreamy."

"Beginner's luck," he adds.

"Yeah, okay, Dream. We can rematch then."

He agrees and we rematch. I win again, but only by half a heart.

"I can't believe this," he says. "Are you hacking? Is that why Tommy is in your chat?"

"Dream, Dream, I'm going to play this impossible drinking game."

"What are you talking about, drunkard?"

"Basically, everytime I win, I have to take a shot. I bet I'll be piss-drunk after this."

"Wooow, don't get too cocky. Rematch, rematch."

"It's okay, Dream. I'll let you pay me the $100 instead of $200."

"Thanks, Az. How sweet," he says sarcastically, and laughs. "No, no, I'll pay you the $200 right now. But I'm winning after this."

"Alright. Be right back," I say, muting myself. I look at the camera and talk to the chat. "Hello, chat. What I'm going to do is drink everytime I lose, not everytime I win, because I think that'll be more effective. It'll be our secret."

"Are you ready?"

"Yeah," I say, taking my axe out.

"Go."

And Dream wins the next 10 fights. But, to be honest, I wasn't trying after he won the first two. And, no, that's not something that I'm just telling myself. It's the truth, okay?

"Well," I say, turning my music back on. "I think that's enough fights for tonight."

"I beat you so hard."

"You might want to reword that, Dream."

He laughs. "You know what I mean. I wrecked you."

"Still might wanna reword that, Dream."

"But I did."

"You lost $200 tonight to me. If anyone wrecked someone today, it was me."

"Yeah, yeah."

"Anyway, I think I'm going to end the stream. Thanks for tuning in to my late night talkshow, chat. I'm getting tired. Who do you guys want to raid?"

Dream hums for a second. "I think you should raid Sapnap. He's Just Chatting right now."

"Oh, is he? I thought he was on Instagram."

"He's pretty unpredictable."

"Okay, let's raid Nick. Chat. Join his stream. He's really cool. If you like hearing me sing, you'll like hearing him sing."

"That is a fallacy."

"I love it when Sapnap sings."

"I mean, it's funny."

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