The Gift of Arrogance

Responsibilities and Drawbacks

“If you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.”

Friedrich Nietzsche

Insight. A highly desirable trait that each and every one of us wants more of. Sometimes we need it for our futures in law enforcement, business, or psychology. Sometimes we want it for things like friendship, dating, or dealing with family. The truth about insight is that it can be instrumental in all of these things, and yet if I wasn’t naturally insightful I wouldn’t teach myself to be. Why do you ask? Insight is truly a gift with almost unlimited use, which is only exceeded by the responsibilities and drawbacks that come from it. This includes the effects if you ignore these responsibilities.

The first responsibility is the responsibility to respect other’s space. I was recently texting a friend of a friend after a bad day and after 6 texts I told her a fairly comprehensive read I got of her. Not a good ice breaker. Due to my emotional state after a hard day, I misjudged the line and crossed it... and then some. It left the girl I was texting uncomfortable and I felt bad for having such a disastrous interaction. One thing you should know is that I have 18 years of this method under my belt, as it comes naturally to me so I sometimes react to things people don’t want me to see. I’ve been told by multiple people that after 5 minutes I know them better than their best friends. While on the topic of best friends,I should bring up the rule I have with my best friend. She and I both possess our own unique and equal types of insight. If  she and I began reading each other, the friendship would lose its trust and ultimately deteriorate. We both need to give each other space, as each of us deserve to have some type of privacy. If one of us has a problem, the other needs to trust that they can and will come forward in the case of a problem. Until then we actively ignore cues.

The second responsibility of insight is to never use your knowledge as a weapon. I was walking home with a friend of mine, and he was being a bit of a Debbie Downer so I got bored and started to annoy him. He ended up punching me in the stomach. I lost my temper and rather than hitting him, I went off on him about how pathetic it is that he would rather be a misanthrope than deal with his anxiety problems. By the end of the conversation, he walked off in tears. The thing about insight is that you learn people’s greatest insecurities, and that means you know right where to jab the sharp stick metaphorically speaking. The sharpest eye stabs deeper than the sharpest knife. My friend wasn’t talking to me for over a week and basically ran away every time he saw me. I regretted the use of my insight hugely. I’m lucky that my friendship went back together, and it will always remind me to be mindful of my anger.

A key responsibility that comes with insight is the need to act on it in a careful and responsible manner. The reckless approach taken on the show Lie to Me will prove to do more damage than good in most situations. It is truly rare that I confront a person directly with a reading. There is maybe a 5% chance that that approach is the right thing to do, depending on your mastery of insight. Regardless of your skill level, advancing beyond that 5% is reckless, irresponsible, and will start to hurt people. Your tact must rely on the context of the reading (eg your relationship with the person, the inhibitions of the person, and other contextual details).

Last year in biology, my teacher gave four ludicrous sounding statements about DNA as an introduction to genetics. He always avoided calling on me, because I would always answer correctly and mock him in the process. As a result of this, I could listen to others’ questions and watch his reactions. His face remained deadpan when people answered true (Which fits with the fact that classroom behavior by first year teachers during warm ups tends to be rehearsed.), but when people answered false I saw a microexpression of happiness with just a hint of contempt. After 5 minutes, I knew the answer beyond a doubt. I waited 15 minutes to see if any of my classmates could catch on, but they didn’t. I considered the low stakes of the situation and raised my hand, much to my teachers dismay.