Never Always (NaNoWriMo 2014)

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Thirteen

He cradled me against his body and used his other hand to strum against my lower back.

“You’re the same shape as my guitar.”

“That’s not flattering at all.”

He smiled down at me. “Yes it is. I love the shape of you.”

“Grady—”

He placed his fingertips between the grooves of my spine and used the fingers of his other hand to brush against my lower back once more. It felt—I wiggled a little closer and pressed my face against his chest. He chuckled and pressed his hands flat against my back.

“You’re the perfect shape, Page. Don’t let anyone tell you different.” His finger found one of my stretch marks and he started tracing it. “You’ve got bumps and scars and sadness written all over you. I want to learn every single one.”

“Why?”

“Because I want to know you again.” His hand ran from my lower back, around my butt, and came to rest on my thigh. “Every part.”

It wasn’t that I was opposed to the idea. But our time together was limited. We had separate lives, having nothing to do with the other, and I didn’t see how this would work past these next few days. I’d lose him again but for some reason my mind wouldn’t let me fully process. My brain and heart were in denial. My body was following right along behind them.

Self-indulgence. Planet denial. I was existing in both and very ok with it.

“The reunion will be over in two days. That’s not enough time to learn anything.”

“Who says this’ll end when the reunion does?”

“Who says it won’t?” I whispered.

I looked up at him and he stared down at me. The lazy contentment on his face was replaced with intense seriousness. “I told you I’d stay. I promised.”

“We both know you can’t. You have a life that doesn’t include me and I—”

“I just got you back, Page. I never thought—I’m not giving you up over something as simple and pointless as distance.”

“I’m not back, Grady. I’m just here. For now. As are you.”

“You’re expecting this to end.”

“Aren’t you? Everything you say here, now, may not last past us getting out of this bed. Leaving this room. Going our separate ways.”

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“I’m being rational and reasonable. I’m thinking long term, not only what will happen in the next few seconds or minutes. I have to be responsible—”

“You’re acting as if being here, letting me back inside you, doesn’t matter. It does, Page. It matters a whole hell of a lot.”

“It’s called resolving our issues. Short term.”

“You think screwing me out of your system will do that? I hate to tell you this but it’s not going to work, not with us. We have a long list of issues that need to be resolved and one roll in the sack doesn’t even come close to covering it.” I hooked a leg over his hip and burrowed closer. He didn’t seem to mind and held me tighter. “I hurt you, I get that. It’s going to take time and me following through for you to even begin to believe what I say. But don’t think I’m not going to try. Because I am. I want this. I want you and I’m willing to earn it all back in order to have it.”