You can learn to love• Kyman love story•(completed)

On our doorstep

Kyle held the baby, and he almost looked like a loving mother. He held the baby so carefully, and rocked her side to side.

"You need me to stay until your mom comes?"

"Sure, I could use your girly knowledge of babies and shit."

" You shouldn't cuss with a baby in the room."

" You act like I wasn't raised by a whore."

"You also shouldn't talk about your mom like that. Even if she's a whore, she's still your mom."

" Whatever."

"Hey Cartman?"

"Hm?"

"How do you know it's a girl?"

I turned to Kyle, who was eyeing the baby curiously.

"I dunno, I just assumed so."

"Should we check?"

"You can, but I'm gonna stand over here if you do." 

I walked into the kitchen, and let Kyle check.

"Yup, she's a girl."

"Fucking nasty. Well, since I'm in here, what do babies even eat?"

"Mashed vegetables and milk. She looks to be about 9 months old, so regular milk should do."

I shrugged and grabbed a cup, and I felt Kyle staring at me.

" What?!"

"You know a baby can't drink from a cup."

"Well, we don't exactly have any bottles Jew."

Kyle thought for a moment, and got up, handed me the child, and headed out, saying,

"I'm gonna borrow one from Kenny. His parents have been trying to get pregnant again, and they've been stocking up."
And he left. I set the kid down on the floor, and it started to crawl around like a giant roach. I figured I should distract the little thing and turned on some "Nicktoons" on the TV. Of course, SpongeBob was playing, cause networks like to milk the shit out of that show, and she was glued to the TV. She didn't laugh, or smile, or even blink, she just watched expressionlessly. She seemed like an adult trapped in a baby body, and I couldn't shake that uneasy feeling about her.

Kyle came back shortly, with a baby bottle in hand. I didn't bat and eye as Kyle filled the bottle with milk, heated it up, and handed it to the child. She took it, and didn't like the taste, throwing the bottle at the tv. I started to yell at her, but Kyle started to console her, holding her and the bottle, and sweet talking her.

"I know it new and yucky, but we don't really have a choice right now kid. Please."

He started to feed it to her, and she eventually warmed up. He flopped on the couch next to me, still feeding the kid, and watching her. He then got this weird look on his face, turned to me and said,

"Cartman look!"

I looked, but I didn't see anything except a half asleep baby.