It's About Her!

Awareness is a curse.

Zoya's eyes accused the woman who was supposed to protect her, but she defended herself by saying that she had no option. She knew it was a pure lie, but she had no other way. She convinced Zoya that as it is previously, many nights had spent this way and one more won't make any huge difference. The betrayed girl followed her mother to the devil's den and sat on his bed without a word. The lust in his eyes has doubled up by now. This time when she laid on the bed she was fully aware of what was she doing and it disgusted her, made her feel like puking. She holds her hand to her mouth and ran to the washroom. She remembers how much she had cried that night in disgust.

Indeed, Its true Unawareness is bliss, and awareness is a curse.

And, She was living a curse today. She cried and cried, begging Allah to send her help today. But he must be busy looking after his other valuable followers, as she thought. No matter how much she silently prayed, but no one came for her rescue that night. When he finished with her she was sore, not only from his assault but also with her tears. She felt disgusted in her own body, no matter how much she rubbed herself, the feeling of him never left her. She cried and cried her heart out that day when she learnt the lesson she is alone in this universe.

Her mother came the next morning to clean the bedsheet. She was acting all normal but avoiding her eyes.

"Why aren't you looking at me?" demanded Zoya. She wanted her to see what she has made her do. She wanted her to see that man's semen dripping from her. She wanted to see the creases on the bed. She wanted her to witness the broken pieces of bangles. How could a mother do it to her own daughter? She cried.

And she laughed when the woman before her replied.

"You don't know what we have gone through. Your dad had left us to die in poverty. We had no food or shelter. No one was ready to take us in and that's when she found him. He promised he would give her shelter and care. And he also allowed me to let you stay."

Zoya got to know the price of having a roof over the head. She paid more than money to get that food on her plate. Everything is traded in the market, she came to know about the price of her tears in the market today. She felt like a goat whose every part and organ is sold in the market. Her emotions were naked and eyes streamed river. Zoya laughed at her speech to be grateful about, that monster had used her daughter and she had no problem to it.

As the days passed she realized, this world is so selfish. When she thought the nightmare was limited behind the closed doors, suddenly the house became crowded with an unknown guest. It didn't take her long to understand why they were here; she cried again that night, praying it to be just her fear. But as she concluded Allah was never on her side and she became just a commodity to be used and thrown as they liked. She was glad her mother at least let her study, but what was the use when her mates in daytime were her clients at night. She had surrendered to her fate and adjusted to reality. The world had more hungry wolves than those at her home. Her life was always private and her parents never let her be a friend to anyone and once again the loneliness dawn upon her.

It was a similar night when rain poured heavily, mirroring the storm in her. She had stopped crying, and the sky was crying on behalf of her. Her eyes became moist as she played that night when few men dragged her like cattle ready to sacrifice. She was stunned for a moment when she got to know her father had sold her to a brothel owner and declared her disown.

How could she ever forgive the woman who gave birth to her? How could she forgive the man who was responsible? She let her mother die with the guilt, but now the guilt of not forgiving her eats her up. Her mother died by killing a part of her.

"Zoya, you will catch a cold. Come in." Akanksha called her from inside the room. She could feel the worry in her voice but little did she know she was worrying for her body without a soul.