bleeding hyacints | skk

sorrow.

: errors ahead.

Dazai was not awoken by his alarm but rather by the sudden urge to cough, it was an itchy and painful feeling, he feels like his lungs are being filled with water, it suffocated him. Therefore, he immediately got up from his bed and went to his bathroom, placed himself in front of his sink, he coughed and coughed then it was followed by blood and petals of purple hyacinth. He wasn't sure why and how he got this, but he is sure that this is because of his encounter with his ex partner, Chuuya Nakahara, yesterday.

It has been a four years since he last saw the redhead, he clearly remembers his aura, his height, his attitude, his clothing style, he remembers Chuuya Nakahara very clearly. He didn't expect them to be having a reunion in a place like this, in a position where he is being confined in a Port Mafia establishment. They are in the same place, yet they are now on opposite sides, light and dark.

He looks up at the familiar voice and light footsteps escalating down the stairs, deep inside of him, he felt slightly relieved to see that the hatrack is still alive and kicking, it doesn't look like he grew tall at all even after four years. His sense of fashion is still the same, horrible. The reunion wasn't pleasing at all, it was the both of them punching and kicking each other until dazai was pinned on the wall by the redhead, his gloved hand wrapped around his neck while the other hand is holding a knife, inches away from his throat.

Sadly dazai isn't here for a reunion, he went here to gain information about the person who put a heafty bounty for his protègè's head, Atsushi. Their conversation ended with Chuuya, of course, screaming again at the top of his lungs and embarassed. When the nighttime came, dazai laid still on his futon, eyes gazing at the moon that is peaking on his bedroom window.

He suddenly chuckled when he remembered the encounter with Chuuya, he didn't change at all after so many years. His voice, his eyes, everything about him is still the same when dazai left Port Mafia. There's a light feeling on his chest when he thinks about the hatrack but he quickly dismissed it, thinking it was probably the cold breeze filling up his lungs so he closed his eyes and went to an dreamless slumber.

Now back to the present, dazai is slightly concerned about the petal of hyacinth that came out of his mouth.

'What is this? What is happening?' he thought, mind thinking about the possibilities where, how, when and why he got this but he came up with only a few information. This feeling of unknown scared Osamu Dazai slightly, is it really unknown or he is just denying the fact?

Dazai immediately washed his mouth, wincing at the coppery taste left by the blood and grabbed his phone. He didn't know if he's going crazy or is he still dreaming but he ignored the feeling, he searched online and stumbled upon a few cases. His eyes widened at the information layed out in front him, he have hanahaki.

The brunette chuckled, there's no way he have hanahaki, a fucking fictional disease caused by a one sided love. Who could've he love? He isn't in any relationship. He likes nobody. Then his mind wandered on the redhead, his partner, Chuuya Nakahara.

He chuckled again, "Holy shit i'm stupid," he said to nobody, tears now starting to make their way across his plush cheeks. He buries his face on his hands, crying at how long he failed to realize he fell in love with his partner.

Osamu Dazai, the ability user No Longer Human, have Hanahaki and for once in his life, he cannot nullify the flowers that are starting to bloom on his lungs.

As time passed by, many events on Yokohama happened and now Osamu Dazai is paired with Chuuya Nakahara again to retrieve Q from the grasps of The Guild. It would be a lie if Dazai's condition didn't worsened, his body started to feel more frail and weak. His lungs and throat hurt everytime he breathes but despite all of that, he keeps it from everyone else, this is his personal problem, there is no need for his co-workers to be involved.

His eyes follows the rampaging figure of his partner as he destroys Lovecraft using Corruption. Dazai watches as the love of his life get tired and slowly destroy his small body. He watches as Chuuya started laughing like a maniac, throwing balls of his ability left and right then stopping to release a massive one. The brunette then immediately came over to Chuuya, held his tiny wrists and activated his ability, stopping Chuuya from his rampage.

"You've eliminated the enemy, take a rest," he said to the latter.

He watched as the red figures on his partner's body disappear, he fell on his knees, weak, bleeding and tired from the use of his ability.

"I told you to stop me as soon it was over," his partner said, head down, knees on the ground and using his arm to keep himself stable.

"I was going to, but it was entertaining, so I had to watch," Dazai replied back in a joking manner while leaning forward slightly towards Chuuya.

Chuuya then lifted up his head, there's a blood running down and said to Dazai, "I used Corruption because I trusted you." Those words made Dazai's heartbeat fast and chest tighten but kept a straight face.

"You....better bring me to the extraction point," the redhead said, arm lifted up to make an attempt to punch the brunette on the chest then fell on the pavement due to exhaustion.

"You got it, buddy," Dazai said to Chuuya's unconscious figure while smiling with his eyes closed.

After the fight with The Guild, both organizations parted their ways thus including Chuuya and Dazai. The events were indeed tiring and Dazai wouldn't deny it one bit. As soon as he got back to his place, he let out the coughs he was holding in the whole time, it itches, it hurts, it suffocates him, he wants to vomit. His legs failed him and fell on the floor, hand clutching his chest as he coughs horribly while the other hand is covering his mouth.

His chocolate orbs watches as dozens and dozens of hyacints fell from his mouth accompanied by blood. He was bleeding hyacinths, he managed to laugh at the situation he was in. Purple hyacinths were indeed the meaning of sorrow, it's very fitting, he fell in love with the ability user For The Tainted Sorrow. He fell in love with someone that can't return his feelings, he fell in love with someone who was prohibited to fell in love.

Dazai thought about confessing but as soon as he thought of that, he quickly threw that idea away. He knows that Chuuya doesn't feel anything for him, that it is a bad idea, that it would be a waste of time. He also thought about having it removed through surgery but the brunette despised the idea of forgetting everything about Chuuya Nakahara.

So what did he decided to do? Dazai decided to water the hyacinths and let the garden grow on his lungs. He could've preffered a lover's su¡c¡de with a beautiful woman but this isn't that bad at all. He's fine with dying with his feelings intact towards Chuuya Nakahara while growing a garden on his lungs.

: my first oneshot in a long time. i hope y'all liked it.