It Doesn't Hurt

It doesn't hurt

When I see you

Smiling and talking to her

I'm smiling too

Although it feels unnatural

It doesn't hurt

When she giggles at something you said

And touches your arm

Letting it linger

And you let it linger

And somehow I can't remember 

The last time you made me laugh like that  

It doesn't hurt

When she places your hands

On her waist

And you're both swaying to the music

And I'm here gripping a drink, standing completely still

It doesn't hurt

When you're staring deep into her eyes

And you're smiling like she's the only one there

And everyone else doesn't exist

Including me

It doesn't hurt

That you once looked at me like that

Like time didn't exist

When we were together

But now I can count all the minutes and seconds

Ticking by so slowly

It doesn't hurt

When you brush a stand of hair behind her ear

And cup her face so delicately

And the moment is so intense, you both stop breathing

I stop breathing too

It doesn't hurt

When you lean down

To meet her lips

Your eyes closed

And you stay like that 

Even though I have to turn away

Hours later

Alone in the dark

Hands shaking

A single sob

Now it hurts