Death and Life

The Final Farewell

I shall enter into my heart's citadel-city.

I am a worshipper of the Fire God;

I am a lover of the Fire God.

I have blossomed today

Into the melody of fiery flames.

The bondage of possession-greed,

The iron control of dark attachment,

The torture of penury,

The pangs of my shattered dreams

Have at last disappeared in a twinkling

Into the farthest, remote unknown.

On my finite lap the infinite is swinging.

The ever-intoxicating and ever-energizing

Flute of Sri Krishna

Is the very origin of my life's journey.

The Destruction-Dance of the great Lord Shiva

Ushers in a new creation

Encircling fast my earth-bound life.

- translation of Ami Jabo, by Sri Chinmoy

"Singing? Oh, dear."

Mum appeared not to be too confident in our abilities. Which made me question the program for the cremation ceremony for a moment. But then I decided that I did not care, since my aim was to please Dipavajan and not her. After all, the funeral was all about him and his life.

Well, naturally it was also about his death, but if what all the spiritual masters, these people having had a near-death experience and the angels have said was true, then he would be around.

Therefore, I'd chosen to make this funeral all about his beautiful, happy life and about hope. And obviously there was no celebrating his life without including the Peace Run. (At the turn of the millennium, Dipavajan had morphed the European leg of the Sri Chinmoy Oneness-Home Peace Run - a relay run to inspire peace in the hearts and minds of human beings, which had been created by Sri Chinmoy in 1987 - into a truly international event by developing a continuous route through all the European countries. It had also been his idea to organize two mini vans for the project, to enable a permanent, but continuously changing team of fourteen members to lead the torch-relay for peace along this route. Starting in 1999, he himself was on the road for most of the seven months that it usually took to finish the tour. Consequently, the Peace Run had been a major part of his life for a long time.)

Which was why we (the members of the Sri Chinmoy Centre Graz) were going to sing the Peace Run and the World Harmony Run songs right after my speech. As Dipavajan and I had both left the Catholic Church decades ago, I had to be the MC of the ceremony, as no priest would be attending. And my father-in-law was so beside himself with grief, he'd been more than relieved to have me take charge of everything.

Which should have been too much of a burden for me at that point, since organizing events was something I found exceedingly stressful at the best of times and this did most definitely not count as one of those. But for some reason, I found that strength continuously flowed into me from some unknown well deep inside.