Enamoured.

Reality

Elena's P.O.V.

Remember me? The girl with a messed up life, dead ex-boyfriend and arrested parents. Yup, that's me. Still here, I don't know how, but I'm still here, struggling my way out of this.

At this point, I can't even arrange the thoughts in my head. Everything is a big mess up there and I feel so lost.

I've been trying to fall asleep for the past two hours and I can't even close my eyes without picturing Yoongi's dead body in my head. That awful gunshot sound was still ringing in my ears and I couldn't find a way to make it stop.

Tae was right next to me, hugging me real tight in his sleep, afraid of letting me go or losing me to such a stressful situation. His left arm was wrapped around my waist, his whole body pressed against mine.

I stopped crying like an hour ago and I have been staring at the wall in front of me for a very long time. My mind was racing, I was overthinking everything and I even got to the "how the hell am I going to bury Yoongi?" kind of thoughts.

My emotions were all over the place, it was all overwhelming, too much for both my heart and my head to even grasp. Yoongi is dead. Dead. And once again, I disappointed my parents, one last time.

I suddenly got angry, this was all Yoongi's fault. If he hadn't changed, if he hadn't used those damn drugs, everything would have been alright. Now, even after his death, he' still ruining my life.

Angry tears ran down my face and I felt how my breathing became more rapid, my breaths were shorter and sharper. I got up from the bed with Taehyung immediately following me.

"Elena, are you okay?" - he grabbed my hand and turned me around so I was facing him. I wiped my face and looked him in the eyes. He was really exhausted, it looked like he didn't even sleep.

"Yes, I just gotta use the bathroom. Go back to sleep, please. You look awful."

I caressed his cheek and kissed him, as if it was a goodnight kiss. He pulled me back by my forearms when I tried to walk away.

"I don't care what I look like, I just wanna know you're okay, which you're obviously not."

"Do you expect me to be okay with his death? Do you think that he deserved to die? What the hell is wrong with you?!" - I banged my fists against his firm chest but he still refused to let me go.

"I didn't say anything Elena, please calm down. I don't care about him, I really don't. Right now, I just care about you. Tell me what to do, how can I help?"

"Nothing, there's nothing, you can't bring him back." - I started crying again so he hugged me again. I felt so safe but at the same time I felt like betraying Yoongi, flying into another man's arms.

I gently pushed him away and explained that I just had to use the bathroom. He stayed in the room and when I got back, I found him at the edge of the bed, sitting there and waiting for me.

I straddled him and hugged him with all my strenght. He immediately wrapped his arms around my body, comforting me. The warmth of his body was so soothing but I felt something cold on my neck so I leaned backwards. It was the necklace Yoongi gave me, the one with his initials. I ignored it but still decided that I had to get rid of it.

An idea came to me so I planned everything perfectly. I just felt like I had to get rid of it. Not later, I had to do it now.

As soon as I felt that Tae fell into a state of deep sleep, I got up and quietly put on some random clothes. I called Robert to come and pick me up while I was putting on my shoes. I tried to do everything in a very quiet manner because I really didn't want to wake up Taehyung.