1: He's here

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13/8/19

I lay in my hospital bed tired and sore but it was all worth it.

I looked down at the precious baby next to me and couldn't stop staring at him, he is so beautiful.

He already has a full head of dark hair and he is in his little hospital outfit

My mum and dad we're here with me right now meeting him and Lottie, Daisy and Phoebe were on their way over to meet him.

"He's so beautiful darling, I'm so proud Reags" my mum said admiring him

"He is isn't he, he looks just like his dad" I said my voice cracking and my mum hugged me

I got my phone and decided to let everyone know, right now only the girls and my family know.

I just sent a big group message to the X factor group chat, well the one we made which has, me, Molly, Scarlett, United vibe boys, Shan and Brendan

But seriously I don't know how Louis hasn't found out, I don't think he has really been in contact with anyone though apart from his sisters who have been quite good at keeping it

I sent this message

Reagan: guess who's finally here, feel free to come to the hospital, he's amazing x

I put my phone down and turned to my mum

"Have I done the right thing?" I asked and my mum looked at me confused

"What do you mean" she asked

"Like not telling Louis" I struggled to say his name

"I can't tell you what the right thing is Reagan, if you feel that this is the right thing then that is your choice" my mum said

"I just feel really guilty like I don't want the baby to have a bad life because I made a bad choice, it's just like I'm so embarrassed after everything that happened with Louis, was I just a fling to him?" I said getting upset, my emotions were all over the place right now

"Baby don't feel guilty, that baby is gonna have the most amazing mum ever and he has a massive family who are gonna love him so much. What Louis done was very wrong and he had no right to do that to you. But he did seem like he loved you so I don't know why he did, I can assure you that it wasn't a fling though" my mum said wiping my tears as my dad left the room to give us a minute

My mum and dad were so angry at Louis after what happened.

Even though I hate him so much for what he done, I still love him, he is still the only person in the world who I could feel like this about.

"I love him mum, I don't know what I did wrong" I said crying

"I know you do baby" my mum said getting upset "you did nothing wrong, he must of just not been in the right place. But that doesn't excuse what he did, I get why you don't want to tell him but you need to remember he is the dad. But whatever decision you make I'll be here"

"It's just he looks so much like him and it just reminds me, if Louis were to ever see his face he would know right away and that's scary" I said and she nodded

"Well we will deal with that when it comes to it" mum said and gave me a hug

We hugged for a bit until someone knocked on my door, my dad popped his heart in

"The girls are here" dad said and I nodded

I wiped my tears and cleaned my face before mum got up

"I'll give you some time with them okay?"

"Yeah okay, thank you mum, I love you both" I said to my parents and they returned it

I pulled the baby's cot thing closer to me and I sat up and stroked his cheeks just as the door opened and I saw three beautiful faces

They all had massive grins and I smiled

"Omg hi" Lottie whisper squealed and ran over to hug me.

Daisy and Phoebe did the same

"Hi girls" I said and smiled to them all

They all then gathered around the baby's cot and they all gasped

"He's so beautiful" Daisy said in awe

"He is isn't he" I said and wiped a tear

"Aww don't cry" Phoebe said giving me a hug and sitting next to me

"Sorry just my emotions are everywhere" I giggled and so did they.

"He looks so much like Lou" Lottie said and I nodded and looked down "oh sorry"

"Don't worry about it, he does" I said and looked at him making them all give me sympathetic smiles

"So" I said breaking the silence "who wants to hold him?"

They all said me and Lottie held him first, she was so good with babies and just knew what she was doing

"Oh my god I love him so much already" Lottie said and started saying stuff to the baby even though he was sleeping

After a bit she handed him to Phoebe who got a bit emotional and same with Daisy

"I don't know what to do" I said to them making them all look at me "I feel so bad for not telling Louis but I feel like I just can't after I didn't get the chance to before"

"You don't need to feel bad, Louis has just left and been in la since everything, he won't even make a effort to come see his sisters, he came back when Fizzy passed but that's it. If he was here it would be different" Lottie said

"I saw something about him and Eleanor" I said making them all look at me in shock "is it true?"

They all gave me sympathetic smiles

"Yeah I'm sorry Reags but they are back together" Daisy said softly and I just nodded

I tried to hold back my tears but a few slid down anyway.

"I always knew I was never enough for him" I said and shook my head while laughing sarcastically

"You deserve more than him if I'm being honest" Phoebe said "since X factor he's just not been the same person, and you deserve someone that will put you first"

"I love you girls" I said and all them gave me a hug

"So then, what's this little guys name" Lottie asked

I smiled looking at the baby in Daisys arms

"Romeo Williams"

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