How to Save the World With Ramen

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Teuchi didn't want to be a ninja, he really didn't. His dreams were simple: learn his father's trade, set up his own stall, have a kid to teach the family business. That's all he wanted. Alas, his family hit a rough patch around the beginning of the second Shinobi war. Teuchi was all of 9 years old at the time. Back then, during wars where soldiers were short on stock, Konoha had a scholarship system.

The deal was simple. Become a ninja and serve for five years, then you'll be financially well off for a decade. Teuchi saw his chance to save his family's ramen shop and took it, firmly determined to keep it alive. He graduated in two years, older than a lot of the genin (cannon fodder) graduating were. He served five years in the genin corps, sending scrolls to relief teams and to squads at outposts. A lot of the work was back breaking, physical labor that couldn't be done by civilians.

Teuchi was given a field promotion after killing a man with a pair of chopsticks.

He didn't mean to, really. Then again, he did. He was eating lunch with his team and a team at an outpost, having just delivered the fifth scroll of the day. There was a ninja from rock country, a poorly trained assassin Teuchi would say, who tried to sneak up on the older jounin squad with a poorly weaved genjutsu. His teammates didn't notice, they were laughing at a jounin who'd managed to snort noodles down his nose.

Teuchi would have missed it too, if the guy hadn't failed to cover his kunai in genjutsu. He was up in a flash, chakra pulsing out in a short burst. His hand had moved before he realized what he'd done. Stab, stab, slosh.

Stabbed the eyes, stabbed the side of the neck, and rammed the chopsticks up the guys nose with a force coming from Sage knows where. He couldn't use chopsticks for days. Not until his sensei sat him down and made it very clear that he had saved six lives upfront and countless others. Teuchi didn't feel so bad anymore, and none of his teammates commented on the way he'd stab his sushi as he picked it up.

On another mission, one near the end of his fourth year, his new squad ran into some trouble. He was a chuunin by then, holding out only for the fifth year so he could finish his damn ramen apprenticeship. His new squad ran head first into a lighting squad, also chuunin based on their uniforms. Teuchi isn't sure what happened, just what he gained. A summoning scroll, one for praying mantises of all things. His teammates had blanched, being particularly queasy around bugs with long limbs.

Teuchi signed it anyway.

The rest of his time as a Shinobi faded together, quick and as uneventful as it could be in a war. He was taken off the active duty roster, though his license wasn't revoked at all. He finished learning how to make ramen from his father and took over his family shop during the shaky peace time. The name was displayed proudly.

Ichiraku Ramen.

Never had he been so proud to bare his family name. Business crawled by, customers coming every now and again. Soon, his demographic shifted from civilians to ninja. Ninja who didn't recognize him. Ninja who assumed he was civilian. They'd gossip quietly at the counter while Teuchi prepared the ramen in the back, well out of ear-shot for a civilian. Teuchi was a damn good chuunin and he'd wouldn't be worth his salt if he couldn't even enhance his hearing.

It was while he was preparing ramen in the back that he heard an interesting bit of information. A chuunin relief squad was planning on turning against their fellow ninja and siding with the enemy. They'd been bribed and payed half upfront. Teuchi served the food with a cheerful smile, waving away the customers who'd ordered to go. The smile faded and he went into the back, dragging a heavy hand down his face. It was bad, but if nothing else, all ninja were opportunists.

Teuchi hardly had to use any chakra at all to summon a single mantis, and the puff of smoke was nearly invisible. She had been startled at Teuchi summoning her, but once he explained the situation, Yuri was fully in board with the idea. It was this way that Teuchi was put on the secret operations list, a list that only department heads and the Hokage himself had access to.

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