Ivypool's memories (Major Changes were made)

Giving up. ( 2 )

Another week had passed when Jayfeather finally gave up. He contacted Starclan countless times, not sleeping as she tried to find an alternative. But he couldn't. He felt like a failure. Ivypool had become very quiet, and rarely spoke. Briarlight helped the queen by making her feel as comfortable as possible and provided emotional support to both her and Jayfeather.

"Jaybird... Jayfeather... It's okay. You tried your best, I'm sure Ivypool will understand. She feels bad for making you work hard for her. At least you tried." Briarlight mewed gently, laying down next to the blind tom. "But what if I haven't tried hard enough..." Briarlight nudged him encouragingly. "We don't have any more time; it would be worse failing when the kits are too big for abortion than now. I don't want to have to do it either, but if there's nothing we can do then there's nothing we can do."

Jayfeather relaxed, giving in to his tiredness. He yawned, stretching. "I wish we could let her just have her kits then... do it afterwards. But now she and her kits have to suffer because of those stupid Dark Dwellers, they'll most definitely snatch the kits right after even if there are only a few of them left. I hear Mapleshade is still alive."
Briarlight grunted, sharing her hate for the cats. The Starclan cat that came down to explain to her why the two slender cats had passed out had also told her everything. "I really need to use the dirtplace." Jayfeather got up, dragging his paws out of the den. Briarlight padded behind a wall which separates the area where patients would usually stay from where Briarlight and Jayfeather would sleep. Ivypool slept there too since she needed someone watching her at all times just in case she held her breath while she slept, had a panic attack or other of the sort. They also wanted her to feel safer.

"Ivypool?"

She didn't respond, staring blankly at the cobwebs covering the scars she gave herself on her arm.

"Ivypool, things will get better. You can have more kits. You can live free of those horrible cats. Doesn't the thought of that make you want to try?"

"Yes..."

"That's a strong one. I'm going to massage you now, okay?"

She gave a small nod, grateful that she asked before touching her body considering what she's been through. Briarlight smothered some strong-smelling herb poultice on her body and balanced herself impressively on Ivypool's slender body, pressing carefully on it. Ivypool let out a tiny moan of pain, arching her back more.

"Ivypool, I- I have bad news."

Her curled ears twitched and moved, pointing in the direction of the light brown she-cat.

"I- Jayfeather... H-He couldn't find... another way... But he tried really hard and-"

"I don't blame him."

Briarlight was silent, tension forming in the air. Ivypool wept softly, whispering inaudible things to her belly. Briarlight curled around her, grabbing one of her back legs that didn't work in between her jaws and placing it carefully on Ivypool's lower body, in an attempt to hug her. She wanted to comfort the queen, but she realised she shouldn't. Ivypool deserved to cry and let out her feelings- She needed to. Jayfeather walked in, pausing. "You told her?"
"Yes... I'm sorry."

"It's alright. I was going to tell her anyway."

He got down on the ground to get on the same level as Ivypool, guilt pinning his ears to his head. "I'm so sorry, Ivy. I tried. I really did. But... If I failed much later, it would be too late. I'm sorry. But now, all I can do is help you as well as I can, so that is what I shall do. Briarlight and I will protect you. We'll take care of you."

Ivypool simply nodded, her claws unsheathed in stress. "You have two more days to say goodbye. Where do you want to... do it?"

"I have a... special place. I could bring you there."

"You want to show us now? I think some fresh air would be good for you."

She slowly got up, wiping the tears and snot from her face and putting on a blank look. Briarlight and Jayfeather gave a surprised look as they prepared themselves to head out. "It gets easy after you do it a lot." She simply replied to the looks they gave her.

They headed out of camp after asking permission from Bramblestar, and met Dovewing halfway wherever Ivypool was leading them. She smelled of Shadowclan. "Ivypool... We should tell-"

"Tell her. Get her away from that bastard."

Jayfeather nodded. Tigerheart was in the mix of the cats who sexually attacked her. "Dovewing."

"O-Oh... hey! What are yo-"

"Stop going out with Tigerheart."

"Look, I love him okay? You-"

"He's a rapist."

"What? No he isn't! Stop lying!"

"I'm not. All the toms in the Dark Forest... Sexually attacked Ivypool. He is one of them."

"Wh- WHAT?!"

Briarlight and Ivypool jumped, waiting in anticipation for her next move.

{AAA RAPE DESCRIBING}

"It is true. They've ruined her life. Just imagine, the cat you're going out with forcefully put his member in your sister. While she's helpless, and scared and weak, crying in a puddle of-"

{OVER}

"OKAY OKAY!"

She had tears in her eyes now, and she tried to wipe them away as they came, running into Ivypool for a hug. "I- I'm so... so sorry... You were right...He's just an asshole." The venom in her voice surprised her. Ivypool hugged her back, crying into her fur. "I'm gonna go kill him."

"N-No... you don't want to stoop to their level."

"Well, I still am going to make him pay. Ivypool, I'm so sorry- I love you, please don't cry. You've got to be strong! We have to tell mom and dad."

"I want to tell them just... right before I get the ab-abor-aborti..."

She sobbed, digging her claws into her sister's fur.

Dovewing's eyes widened. She groomed her sister's fur vigorously.

"Ivy... you don't have to-"

"I do. Starclan told us so."

"Well... I still think we should tell them now. I can beat up Tigerheart later."

"F-Fine. Please, bring them through the tunnel underneath that tree."

Ivypool pointed her nose at a wide tree with its roots creating a cave underneath it. Dovewing nodded, staring into her blue eyes dull with sorrow. She gave her a worried look, hugging her one last time before padding away.