Without A Doubt

Chapter 15.

The whole encounter with Jackie was so confusing that when I got home I completely forgot about the fact that I have a club meeting tomorrow. The only reason I remembered is because my phone asked if I wanted to set an alarm for 6 am. I jumped out of bed and grabbed my notebook from my backpack. I hadn't finished the stupid poem. I set it down on my desk and stared at it for about 20 minutes. I hated it. I kept rewriting it and changing things and going over it. I like it better when she gives us a prompt and we have to write a story based off of the assigned obligations. I know that a lot of people have things that they want to say, but never do, or things that they wish other people knew, but I don't. It's a complicated thing but I like that people don't know certain things about me. No one knows that I have anxiety. No one knows that I'm borderline sociopathic, and no one needs to know these things. They just make everything so much more complicated. What are you supposed to write about when you're not given a topic?

On the way to school I kept worrying about what I wrote. It's clever, but it's not very complicated. I know that everyone will be able to know exactly what I'm talking about, they've all got a really keen sense for literature and writing and the deeper meanings. Maybe I should have just written a story, something lighthearted and easy. Instead I'm making things more complicated for myself.

I sat in my car for a second just listening to music. I didn't want to go into the school yet. It's only 6:38. I've got almost 20 minutes until club meeting even starts, plus mine is the only car in the parking lot. I was still sitting in the car when a work truck pulled up to the school. I watched as Liv got out of the truck and waved. When the truck drove off she just so happened to see my car. I haven't seen her since last Friday when I was leaving Canes to go get Jackie. Liv gave me a look I couldn't read and then disappeared into the school. I started to notice my heart beating. It wasn't racing or anything, it just suddenly made itself known to me. Reminded me that I still had one. I turned my car off, put my headphones in, grabbed my backpack and started for the school. I've grown quite fond of walking through the school when no one else is around. It's quiet, peaceful. When I reached the library, I saw that Liv was the only one in there. I walked into the library then sat on my side of the table while she sat on hers. I took my headphones out then put my arms on the table and rested my head on them like I always do. I stayed like that for a couple of seconds before I heard Liv start talking.

"So, where'd you go on Friday?" I sat up and looked at her.

"I uh, I had to pick someone up from a party." Liv just looked at me with her green eyes and said

"Oh." We stayed quiet for a couple more seconds before I decided that I didn't like it.

"What did you all do after we left?"

"We stayed at Canes talking for another hour then David dropped everyone off." When I thought about everyone a thought popped into my head.

"Are Jane and Carter dating?" Liv gave me a look, like I shouldn't be gossiping.

"I don't know. But it seems like it."

"I didn't mean to pry."

"It's not prying when they're making it so obvious."

"It is a little obvious." Liv laughed a little. I couldn't help but smile. I liked her laugh. Before anything else was said Ms. Scott walked in.

"Look at that. I'm finally on time." She gleamed as she walked through the library doors with a box of donuts in her hands. It's nice that she always goes out of her way to bring us food. A couple minutes later and everyone else started filing in. When Jane and Carter walked in together Liv gave me a look from across the table and we both started laughing to ourselves. After everyone got situated Ms. Scott said,