Why, HERIE?

Chapter One : She Is......

"Crowded hallways are the loneliest places, for outcast and rebels or anyone who dares to be different."

-Invincible, Hunter Hayes

***

HERIE ALCAN

LOOKING down through the bus's window, I can see the people dispersing due to light raining. They were scattered all over, wondering where to shelter or how to cover themselves. I let out a long sign and shifted to my sit.

9:30 am

I'm a bit bound to be late for my 10 am class sa kadahilanang late ako nagising. Adding up to my bad luck, naiwan ako ng unang bus kaya kinailangan ko pa maghintay ng isa pang beses sa panibong bus.

Thanks God, life really isn't working out for me.

Not so long when my music playlist queued the song bluer than blue. I depressingly chuckled. Talaga nga naman.

"Malapit na 'yung Miss GHS pageant, ano? Sino kaya pambato ng class natin?" Said someone from behind. That took my attention for a bit.

"Well, Si Annita lang naman o si Perry ang pu-puwede nating pagpilian. Kaso parehas sila boba, wala tayong pag-asa." I cringed at the choice of words. Narinig kong natawa ang kausap.

"Bakit? Ano ba ine-expect mo? Class C lang naman tayo. Kailan ba tayo nanalo sa mga contests?"

"Sabagay. Hmm...Panigurado naman na Class A na naman ang hahakot. Mga sugapa! Edi sila na!" Then they both laughed at the girl 's remark.

"I don't think so,"

"Pa'no mo nasabi?"

"Hindi na si Herie ang pambato nila eh." Nanigas ako sa upuan nang marinig ang sariling pangalan. My hands unconsciously gripped my phone tighter.

"Hindi lang naman si Herie ang beauty and brains doon, ano ka ba! Si Janice pa at Karen. Ang dami nilang pagpipilian."

"Oo nga. Pero...hindi ka ba nacu-curious kung anong nangyari kay Herie? Thinking back, parang hindi na siya yung dating sarili niya. Sayang."

The other girl sneered.

"Hindi. Who knows? Tsaka wala naman akong pakialam sa mga taga-Class A na 'yan. I'd rather mind my own business. Buti nga' yon eh, one less rival."

Natawa ang kausap. "Ang sama mo!"

Bahagya akong dumausdos pababa ng upuan para hindi nila ako makita. Mas itinakip ko din ng mabuti ang gray hoodie sa mukha at yumuko. I smiled bitterly.

My passion's gone. Everything's gone.

I've no reason to continue living anymore. Now, I just looked like a lifeless body with no soul at all.

Nakalimutan ko na ngumiti, makaramdam ng sakit, sumaya, malungkot o ano pa. I became an emotionless ticking bomb who's ready to explode with one trigger. And all of these were my fault. Entirely my fault.

Nagtataka nga ako eh. Bakit pa ba ako nagpapatuloy mabuhay? Should I do suicide? No, it's a mortal sin. I guess I should just continue living like a zombie. Hihintayin ko na lang ang sarili maupos at mapagod.