Dare #3

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Winter: Set up a blind date for Shrapnel.

Winter: How the fuck am I suppose to do that? I don't know his type!

Qibli: Relax, you'll figure it out.

Winter: OK... I who do I know who else do I know...who also likes guys?

Winter: Aha! I got it!

Later:

Winter: UMBER!

Umber: *sigh*

Winter: Umber, I know you can fucking hear me!

Umber: *ignores him*

Winter: HEY!

Umber: What is it!?

Winter: Come. Here. Young. Man!

Umber: *groan*

*Umber reluctantly approached Winter*

Umber: Yes?

Winter: You're going on a date.

Umber: Huh?

Winter: Don't pretend you didn't fucking hear me. You're going on a date with my cousin, and you're gonna like it.

Umber: Winter, you can't just force me--

Winter: Bitch, watch me!

*Winter then forced Umber in tuxedo*

Umber: Hey! This thing doesn't even fit me!

Winter: Don't tear it, I paid good money for that suit.

Umber: *😡*

Winter: Enough of that face, let's go.

Later:

Umber: I cannot believe you dragged me into this.

Winter: Sshhh! He's here.

*Shrapnel came in, and Umber stared at the IceWing*

Umber: That's your cousin?

Winter: Yeah.

Umber: Hmm. Well, in that case.

*Umber shoved Winter to the floor, and eagerly approached Shrapnel*

Winter: Ow!

Umber: Hi, Shrapnel! I'm Umber.

Shrapnel: Well, it's nice to meet you.

Shrapnel: I just found a nice restaurant in Possibility, I heard they have hot and cold food.

Umber: Yeah, you're hot-- I mean, I like hot guys-- I MEAN, FOOD! Fuck! I like hot food.

Umber: We should go.

Shrapnel: Sounds like a plan.

*The two left without a word, and Winter was still laying on the floor*

Winter: Uh, YOUR WELCOME!

Winter: *grumbles*

Kinkajou: *appears* I can't believe you played matchmaker without me.

Winter: Nobody gives a shit, Kinkajou.

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