FOREVER, YOURS // Matty Healy.

I want to hear you beg for it.

"I don't know." I answered honestly. "I didn't want to believe in love again after Mason but for some weird reason, while I was wallowing in my own self pity I met someone that changed that thought."

"I guess that says more than you realise then." He smirked a little.

"Shut up." I giggled, rolling my eyes at him.

"I just think that you're so fucking smitten by him and it's kinda nice." His smirk turned into a genuinely happy smile.

"All I can say right now is that I just want to see where it takes me. I'm 25 now and it's been a struggle to make it this far without losing hope." I frowned.

"Are you ever going to tell me what happened on New Year's?" His face turned serious. It was like a punch to the gut, ever since that day in hospital he had asked me a few times what I had been going through. I didn't have the heart to tell him about Lax, so I told him that something went down at Ross' party but I wasn't ready to talk about it. Mainly because he was recovering himself from his own traumas. Deep down though I think he wanted to know because it would make him feel a little less alone.

"I don't know if you're ready to hear the truth." I sighed.

"I wouldn't ask if I didn't think I was ready." He said quietly, not looking away from me at all.

"I overdosed and technically died for 3 minutes." I whispered, his eyes widened in shock. "It's okay though, I'm fine now but it was pretty scary."

"How did you overdose?" He scrunched up his face.

"I took a lot of cocaine while I was drunk and my heart couldn't handle it." I said simply. "I don't do drugs, don't worry. It was a weird situation where I felt like I could to try it but it clearly didn't work out for me."

"I'm not gonna make you feel shit for that." He sighed. "I just can't believe you went through that and told none of us."

"I didn't want to, can you imagine the chaos it would create in this family?" I laughed. "Matty and George saved my life, it was scary for them too but I think we're all okay now."

"Are you okay though?" He asked sincerely.

"Not completely, it all still haunts me a little but every day it gets a little easier." I smiled weakly at him. "I had a good support around me to help me out of the dark thoughts surrounding it, hence why I came here Liam. I didn't want you to keep feeling the way you do, while being so fucking alone."

"Sometimes I wonder why our parents treated you the way they did growing up, I didn't understand it then and I still don't. You're the only one in this fucked up family that seems to have human decency for anyone." He furrowed his brows in frustration. "I love you so much, please don't forget that."

"I love you too, fucking idiot." I grinned at him, causing him to smile at me. Maybe he was going to be okay. Maybe I would be too.

-

Driving back to London was something I didn't really know would give me so much excitement. It was only when I saw the exit for London City that it all hit me just how much I'd missed my home for the past few weeks. The smile that was taking over my face as I drove towards the flat was something I don't think you can ever fake. In the most ironic way possible, Brighton kinda helped me a lot.

I parked my car and pretty much sprinted up to the flat, not caring about the fact my bags were still in the car. I would get them later, right now I wanted to be reunited with my boyfriend. I didn't tell him I was coming home yet, I wanted to surprise him. It was still so early in the morning that I doubt he'd even be awake yet.