Drift (Loki x Reader)

I. Migraines

There was a loud ringing all around you and you assumed that your vessel, the vessel back on your home planet, was probably screaming. You didn't often scream during your migraines, though this one was lasting longer than the others had and it was particularly painful the longer they went. Sometimes you were afraid that you would simply fade away into the stars and silence of the universe during your migraines, that your consciousness would never return and your vessel would simply remain in a comatose state, always screaming until your vocal cords ripped in half and you choked on your own blood, ending the hell.

You usually didn't see anything during your migraines, when your consciousness left your body and started exploring the stars. It was more of a feeling, more of a hearing that raced through your understanding. But you were aware that all of these sensations were beginning to fade and the voices of your friends, well most of them you considered your friends, were beginning to grow in strength, overcoming the chatter that you were observing halfway across the universe. You could feel the rawness of your vocal cords that were beginning to croak rather than scream because you had been using them so much and hear the hushed whispers that many were offering, though they knew they were falling on deaf ears.

And just like that, the parts of your mind that had ripped apart from your vessel collided with the part of your mind that had stayed inside and you fell to the ground in a trembling heap.

"Three minutes and thirty-five seconds," someone reported from around you, though your mind was still racing at a million miles a minute to assign a voice to a face. You kept your eyes closed, afraid that if you opened them you would still be halfway across the universe.

"That's impossible." Your brain recognized the voice of Banner. "Most of their episodes - " You visibly flinched at the word episode, " - last only for thirty seconds on average, the longest being two minutes. Sure, these episodes have been getting progressively longer, but the disparity between this episode and the others that preceded it are astronomical."

Astronomical. That was funny given the fact that you had literally been ripped apart across space and time, exploring the stars, like an astronaut. Though human astronauts that would explore different universes or even planets wouldn't come around for another hundred years at least, or at least what you had heard during one of your migraines from how many months ago.

"(Y/n), are you with us?"

You felt Stark's hand clasp around your shoulder, though you could sense the strain in his muscles as if he half-expected you to jolt from your position and shatter the whole building. You didn't want to get up from your spot on the concrete floor, it was rather comfortable. It was like time was frozen at this particular point in time and if you opened your eyes, time would start moving again and the clock would start counting down until your next migraine.

You could practically feel the anxiety pulsating off the man-child billionaire which was rather unusual because his massive ego allowed little room for any concern for other human beings. With a reluctant sigh, you allowed your weight to shift towards your wrists as you pushed yourself off the ground, opening your eyes and wincing as your pupils shrank to accommodate the harsh sunlight.

How does it feel to know that your sun is someone else's star in the nighttime sky?

A feeling of being small, unimportant, that was what the migraines often left you feeling. You were unimportant on Earth, sure, that was the fate that awaited every human. But to explore the universe, or at least to feel the sensation of all existence running through your mind, to hear the chatter of trillions of souls and the massive expanse of time that had hosted all sorts of life, to know you were nothing more than a pixel on a much larger picture, left you feeling even more hollow and empty than before.