Why She Stayed

Chapter 1

I woke up last week. I woke up to my Adam saying my name, Mia. I thought it would all be ok. I thought I'd heal then go home to teddy and mom and dad. That fantasy could never happen...

"Do you want to take a walk around the nurse's station or go get something from the vending machine?" Adam, my Adam, asked. I shook my head no. Going outside this hospital room meant facing the world and I wasn't ready for that. He nodded his head like he understood, but no one did. No one could fathom what I was feeling or thinking. After a while he asked me if I wanted to watch TV. I gave in and let him flip through the channels. Faces passed by, some smiling, some giving a dramatic scene then some I recognized. My family.

"Last Monday the Hill family tragically passed away on this road behind me. Their daughter Mia was thrown from the car and is now recovering in the county hospital with server injuries. We all wish her best of luck." A news caster said, reading from a screen. "I-I'm sorry I thought they stopped running the story." Adam said. He sounded so guilty, and pain filled. Why was he sorry? He didn't run the story? I felt white hot anger fill me. The story shouldn't be news. The story shouldn't have been all over the place like this! They are my family! I shook my head trying to clear the thoughts from my mind, but they lingered like always.

Anger was never far from reach now. "I'll...I'll go get you some Jell-O." he said trying to find a reason to leave. He couldn't be in the room with me for more than an hour or so. I didn't blame him though. Everyone who came to visit felt uncomfortable. I lowered the head of my bed and tried to get some sleep.

'Mia...Mia...Are you coming?'

"Mom!" I screamed as I awoke from my dream. "No Mia it's me." My best friend, Kimmy, said awkwardly. "I'm sorry." I mumbled, awake fully now. She glanced around the room, not able to fully look at me. "How are you feeling?" she asked. She was staring at the wall to my left. "My body hurts." I answered. This was the answer I gave to everyone. It seemed to work since no one asked for a deeper explanation. She mumbled a sorry and grasped my hand. Everyone's touch still felt new to me. I felt rewired and recharged but sore and broken. I felt grateful and mad all at once. I felt hot and cold. "Want to watch TV?" she asked kindly. "NO!" Adam said a little too loud walking back into the room. She looked like she understood and left it at that. "Here." He stammered, handing me the bright orange Jell-O. I looked at it and my stomach did a flip. Any type of food didn't sit right with me, it all made me feel sick.

Adam chose to sit in the chair in the far corner. "Can you play me something?" I asked meekly. Even though I didn't understand how I was feeling I knew I wanted to hear him play. He lost himself whenever he played, lost himself in the music. He nodded slightly then went over and grabbed his guitar. He played softly at first feeling how it responded then dove right in. He played a song I knew and loved.

Today is the greatest day I've ever known.

Can't live for tomorrow, tomorrow's much too long;

When the song ended he was out of breath and had a smile on his face. He looked the happiest I'd seen him since New Year's party, and our break up. Our break ...

That night hit me like a ton of bricks. "Mia?" Kimmy asked timidly. I looked at her with blurry eyes. I blinked a couple times to clear my vision. I nodded my head and said I was fine. She didn't believe me but she kept quiet. My best friend was never known for being at a loss of words. I think that hurt me more than Adam refusing to be near me.

Life is always going to be different for me...