13 years ... a whole decade and 3 more years , I thought that it would be enough to make a friendship life time .I thought it would be enough for a trust to develope for a life time.But it wasn't . It was like my whole world was falling apart in front of me. I feel empty at that moment , I feel nothing,just a hollow , a hole ,which was created by YOU. It was created by you so unmercifully. You broke me so unmercifully.
You didn't gave me any warning notice before. why? I ask u, why?
Why you didn't lessen the contact with me or act rudely towards me before , it could have helped me in understanding that we are drifting apart slowly and we should let each other go.Why you just did this in an instant , You leave me without a word. You said "it would be good for me, you will forget me , it will hurt few days but eventually u will forget me and this pain will go away" but I want to tell u that I am not forgetting u and this pain is not diminshing ,that hole is not diminshing yet it is increasing with each passing day.
How can you be so heartless? How can you let your fingers 'type' that last text. How?. I used to thought that we are friends for forever now. Our friendship and love for each other cannot end till death separate us apart. But you proved me wrong.
You have changed, you were right when you told me "I am changed person now" you were right I now understand , the person I know is dead inside you. You are not that girl anymore I used to spend my time with . That girl was so beautiful, innocent and she is dead now in there and somehow death has separated us . I understand now. You didn't leave me ..The death of that person has separated us apart.
My eyes get watery every time I think about you,there is this sharp pain, my throat get dry and it hurts , it really hurts. You were with me from my childhood , You knew everything about me.My past is full of you , everything in my past is related to you , its like you have snatched my past from me. You broke me girl, you broke ME and this damage is something ,I think, beyond repair. It cannot be undone ,I cannot smile the way I used to smile at you . I just want to ask WHY? ..
WHY?
When you were typing "I dont want to talk to you" didn't your lips quivering like mine when I was reading that line?
I loved you , and now I ask myself WHY I loved someone so much ? and now you should be ashamed of yourself to let a human question himself about the most passionate feeling. You should be ashamed to broke a person full of life. You should be ashamed to let go someone you once loved just because you have found another one.
But how can you? You have changed , haven't you ? It doesnt matter to you any more. But just think what if you find someone new then will u do this to your new friend ?
Girl we all get more trusty, more beautifull, more understanding people with each forward step but It doesnt mean You should leave the previous ones behind. You did wrong , You broke me and it hurts.
I want you happy and I forgive you for doing this to me and If any point in your life you realized that you were on mistake then I pray you can forgive yourself too because the thing you have done, your conscience will never stop pinching you. I pray you will forgive yourself too!.
From Hamail Butt
