The Business Engagement

Tell me no lies

When he had someone break into your flat. I couldn't believe he would stoop so low, then sending someone here to place that rose...'

Ben's hands balled into fists.

'Why didn't you just leave? Why go back to work for him?' Rey asked.

Ben looked broken.

'I have no choice. He has me under contract. I have to work my notice period or he could make life very difficult for me. He'd drag me through the courts until I was flat broke. I know now he won't release me and he won't stop torturing us.

I can see that all of this was futile, even if I do manage to keep up this pretence between me and you until the end of my notice period, he'll never stop. I need to let you go Rey. I should never have gotten you into this.'

So that's what all this was about. She was just a means of escaping a difficult relationship, just not the one she thought. But he had kissed her.

Twice.

Surely that meant something?

She needed to know if it did before she decided what her next move would be.

'Do you care about me at all Ben? Do I mean anything to you? Or was I just a means to an end?'

'No. That's not all you are at me...'

'Then tell me how you feel, because I can't work it out.'

'I told myself it was just a business arrangement. I told myself it was just until I got free of Snoke. But that was a lie. All I've done for weeks is lie to you, to my family and to myself.'

'Then tell me the truth Ben.' Rey said firmly.

'Don't you understand? Don't you see? I love you.'

Rey froze. 'What?'

Ben sat down on the edge of the sofa and rubbed his eyes with his right hand. He turned to look at her once more. His eyes were red and beseeching.

'I said I love you. I've always loved you. I've loved you since the very first moment you walked into my office with a tray full of tea and biscuits and announced you were my new PA and you'd never seen such a state of an office. I love everything about you, I love the way you don't take any of my shit. I love the way you chew your pen caps, I love the way you hum along to the radio while you type up minutes, and I love fighting with you, god, how I love fighting with you every goddamn day, I can't help it Rey. I just love you, all of you.'

'I don't understand....' Rey said.

'Of course you don't. I don't fucking understand so why would you? I'm a fucking coward Rey. Day after day I could have said something to you but I was so afraid of being rejected. So afraid you wouldn't want me that I never said a fucking word about it. Then you went and got that ring stuck on your finger, and I should have treated you with kindness. I should have helped you when you asked me to, but instead I used you for my own selfish reasons. One being my need to escape from Snoke, and the other being that I've longed to be close to you for so long, that I couldn't say no when the opportunity presented itself. I'm scum Rey and I'm sorry I did this to you.'

Rey blinked and tried to process all the information Ben had given her in a very short space of time.

'You....you've been in love with me all this time. All this time?' She asked incredulously.

Ben nodded.

'The whole time?'

'Yes.'

'What about that time you made me work the whole weekend?'