Destined

Future Decisions

"Now wait just a minute there, Pup," my dad stands quickly too, face red as he slams his hand on the table.

"Dad, Don't," I sigh, ready to defend Reed, I mean he's entiteld to his feelings, but he cuts me off, pointing an accusing finger at Reed.

"You're acting like Aspen asked for this all to be thrust on her! She is just as much a victim here if not more! Stop your moaning and bitching -"

"DAD! ENOUGH!" I stand myself, the power in my voice causing my dad's knees to buckle as he drops back in his seat with his head down, "It's been a long day. I have told you all everything I know," Everything of revalence anyway, I add in my head.

"Let's pause and think it over. Nothing needs to be decided tonight," I breifly look at Reed, but his head is bowed, looking at his feet.

No one says anything, but they nod and start to leave the room. My dad stops in front of me, his hands in front of him with a shrug. I give him a weak smile and he leans forward to press a kiss to my forehead.

I nod to Ian and Gage as they pass, both with sympathetic looks on their faces as they shoot a quick glance to Reed, who still refuses to look at anyone.

"Can you shut the door please?" I say to no one impaticular as I sit back down in my chair, watching as Reed runs a frustrated hand through his hair.

I'm not mad at Reed for his outburst, he deserves his feelings just as much as I deserve mine. He shouldn't have to filter himself for me, and I would never ask him to. But we do need to talk now. I've said my peice and now I need to hear his.

"Will you sit down please, Reed?" I say calmly, gesturing to any of the empty chairs from around the room.

Reed finally looks up and I fight to not let the catch in my breath show at the gaze. I will never tire of how he looks at me. Like I am everything good in the world. Like I hang the moon and the stars. Right now the look is there, mixed with something else. Something raw that cracks my heart open easier than an egg.

Slowly he moves to the chair in front of me, that way we are face to face. Not going to lie, it stings a little that he chose to sit across from me and not next to me but I let it go. He's here with me willing to talk, so if he needs physical space than I have to accept that. At least he didn't run from me.

"I should have mentioned it sooner, I admit that," I say after a few beats of silence, collecting my thoughts, "I know how much being Alpha means to you. How much it meant to me," My voice catches and my eyes drop to the table.

Every Alpha lesson my dad gave me, flashes through my mind. The plans that Jenna and I had made to raise the future Alpha/Beta pair of Moonstone together. Every thought I had had about what my future would be, like a map before me - gone like that, in a flash. I will mourn the future I thought I'd have, but I cannot dwell.

Reed eyes narrow as he watches me and I can practically see the wheels turning in his head. He opens his mouth to say something but I put a hand up. I have to get out what I want to say because if I don't I might always regret it.

"No let me finish," he closes his mouth but the suspicion stays on his face, "I would never ask you to sacrifice anything. I sure as hell won't ask you to give up Shadow wolves. This gift - curse - I didn't sign up for it and neither did you. I won't fault you for wanting to stay Alpha of Shadow wolves, but understand that I need to be away from the packs for their safety. It's your choice where you go from here."

I'm proud of myself for keeping my voice firm and my eyes dry. Reed swallows roughly , his fingers drumming against the table. He holds my stare, and I feel like I'm holding a breath just to make sure I don't break. 

"Are you saying you can live without me?" he says finally, his face perfectly masking his emotions from me.

I feel my nose flare as my emotions begin to overwhelm me. My bottom lip quivers, so I suck it into my mouth, trying hard to keep my face and void as his. My thoughts racing with eventually having to live without him as I wait for the next chosen one to free me.

But this has to be his choice. I can't ask this of him. He was to want to be with me, no matter what or else I'll always wonder if he resents me. If he'd have rather left me behind to stay Alpha.

"Is that your choice then?" I whisper, keeping my chin up. Reed's eyes narrow at the quiver in my voice and he leans forward against the table.

"Be honest with me Aspen. Could you live without me?" for the first time his mask breaks and I see a glimpse of the emotions swirling in him.

"Not willingly," I say, finally allowing my tears to fall, "It would be absolute torture to live without. Dammit Reed! the very thought of having to wake up without you by my side is enough to make me want to crawl into a hole and never come out, becuase nothing means anything without you. But I can't ask this of you. I won't!"

I drop my head into my hands, allowing the sobs to tear through me. I know that I didn't ask for this, that He and I are just pawns in a much bigger game, but I can't help by wonder if I were to be given a choice, would I opt out?

If the dark haired woman had put all the cards on the table and told me what I know now, would I have walked away and told her to chose another?

No. I would have taken it and saved another from this pain. I couldn't let her go on without her mate any longer. This curse is mine and it feels like it was always destined to be mine.

I didn't even hear Reed stand or move around the table to me. I just felt his hands on my arms as he pulled me from my chair and wrapped his arms around me in a tight embrace. I bury my face in his chest, savoring the scent of him as he quietly soothes me with a shh sound.

"Maybe," my voice is rough from crying and mumbled by his shirt, "Maybe we can figure something out? You stay Alpha of Shadow wolves and I stay off pack lands still?"

You know that won't work. Rose says quietly, her feelings just as resigned as mine are.

We could try. Even as I say it, it's a weak defense that no one will agree with.

Reeds hands run up my arms until he gently pries me from his chest. He cups my face between his palms, shaking his head slowly.

"That would leave us both vulnerable. We're stronger together and we have a weakness that could be used against us if we're apart," the sob pushes past my lips at his words and I swallow the rest down breaking eye contact with him.

"You're right. I was born and trained to be Alpha, just like you were," his fingers move under my chin, lifting my head up until I'm forced to look at him in the eyes, "fate is cruel that way, I guess. You're not asking me, but I'm telling you. I abdicate my title as Alpha of Shadow Wolves."

My mouth drops open and I'm not sure that I'm even breathing as I search his face for any signs of hesitation or regret. But I see nothing but sincerity and love.

"Whatever we create togther with what has been given to us, is what we're destined to have. It will be better than what we could've inherited because it will be ours -" I don't know if he was finished, but I couldn't wait. I jumped into his arms smashing my lips to his in a hard kiss.

His arms hold me against him, my feet dangling as I keep my grip tight around his shoulders. He doesn't hesitate to kiss me back. It's a frenzied kiss, our lips saying everything they need to. Still I have to ask one more question.

"Are you sure, Reed? We can't -" he smiles softly, cutting me off with his lips.

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