Lonely | Kawoshin

Daydreaming

Shinji had always been a loner, no one ever paid attention to that kid sitting in the middle of the classroom, until today. It was weird how everyone was laying eyes upon him once he steps into the school, he was not used to this much attention and he didn't even know why he was receiving it.

Glances, whispers. What was going on? Shinji asked to himself. But he wasn't the only one receiving all this attention, Kaworu was also being a target of the commotion.

Kaworu shrugged it off, not really caring, but Shinji couldn't stop thinking about it. Did he do something wrong?

Feelings of anxiety ran through Shinji's veins, but it all went away the moment Kawou assured him everything was okay and not to worry about it. He always made him feel better, no matter the situation. But to be honest, Kaworu was also curious of the reason why everyone seemed so interested on them today.

When Shinji waved good morning to both his female classmates, the orange haired one ran straight towards them, almost running into Shinji as she rambled random words no one was able to comprehend.

Shinji slightly frowned as he didn't understand a single thing Asuka had said and that's were Rei came in "She asked, since when did this happen?" She calmly said, explaining the words of her friend towards the two confused guys.

Shinji and Kaworu both looked at each other a shrugged "What?" The pale boy asked.

Asuka scoffed and was finally able to form coherent sentences "You don't have to keep pretending! We don't judge, we just wanna know"

"Asuka-chan, we seriously don't know what you're talking about"

And once again Rei saves the day by explaining what's going "She wants to know since when you two are dating"

Saying that Shinji didn't almost choke to death would be lying. It felt like his entire soul left his body at the thought of people believing he was dating a boy, and ESPECIALLY Kaworu.

It was no surprise to the white-haired boy that rumors were going around school. Everyone knew Shinji and he were really close and spent a lot of time together, alone. Someone was eventually going to notice the subtle glances both gave to each other. Their hands almost holding sometimes, sharing earphones together. But of course, someone was going to notice the way Kaworu stared at Shinji when he wasn't paying attention. That lovingly stare he would give him. His gaze falling from time to time on Shinji's lips, daydreaming about the feeling of them against his own.

It was about time someone noticed the way Shinji so longingly wanted to be at Kaworu's side. How he wanted to be the center of his attention. It was easy to notice Shinji's bright expression every time Kaworu agreed to something.

Their feelings towards each other were so obvious to everyone, everyone except one.

Shinji's face seemed as it was about to explode each time someone asked if they were dating. Kaworu just always answered with a chuckle and explained they were just friends, but there was something that caught Shinji's attention, Kaworu never denied having feelings for him.

Kaworu didn't seem bothered by any of this, he went through his day like any other one. But he did get lost in his thoughts more than the usual. Perhaps he was indeed affected by all these rumors. Shinji had to ask him at their free time.

He asked what did Kaworu think about the whole situation to which he answered bluntly. It's entertaining. Kaworu found it amusing how other people always wanted to get into everyone else's lives, even if they had nothing to do with them. Shinji asked if he wasn't bothered by people thinking they were dating.

"No" Kaworu started "It actually made me think about something"

"And what is that?"

Kaworu then looked at Shinji and gently smiled "About how it feels when you don't want to lose someone else, when you want to touch them, kiss them." Shinji frowned, not understanding, Kaworu continued "I was wondering, how would it feel if you came to love?"