Cracking the Ice

Falling

The cold air was crisp and the sun shines in your face. Steve takes a deep breath beside you before he lets it out.
"There is a car for us just a way north of here," Steve says and starts walking in the thick snow. You follow him and try to walk in his footsteps, but his gait is a bit too long. Snowshoes had been a good idea, but it was too late now. You try to keep up with him and 15 minutes later you came to a big black SUV. Steve takes the keys from behind the front tire and you pack your things into the car. Steve takes the driver's seat so you sit beside him. The warm air in the car feels like heaven against your cold feet. Steve is quiet so you don't say a word. You look out the window to see the beautiful winter wonderland. Alaska was beautiful and you wish you were here on a vacation instead of a mission. Why the hell was Hydra operating in Alaska? Maybe you would find out soon.
"We are soon going to be at the cabin. Do you remember our cover story?" Steve asks and gives you a quick glance.
"Yes, I remember," you look at him. "You are Chris Evans and I am Sophie Micheals, we have been together for three years and since we both love skiing we decided to take a vacation here."
Steve nods, his eyes staring straight ahead on the road.
"I am an English literature student at Harvard and you are a law student at the same university," you continue and sign. Still no verbal response from Steve. If this was a few years ago, he would be talking and laughing with you. Now, just silence. It was slowly killing you. Just this mission, then you would leave. Maybe you could get over him. You looked out on the landscape, trying not to cry.

Steve glanced at Y/N. She had stopped talking and seemed to be lost in her own thoughts. He had not noticed until this mission that she had stopped trying to talk to him. Just a couple of months before she would have tried her best to get him to talk to her, just even for a minute, but not anymore. He sighed because he knew now that he really fucked everything up. More than he had thought after he talked the day before with Bucky, Nat and Wanda.
He wanted to reach out to her. Take her hand in his. Make her laugh, but he did not know-how. It was like he had built up a wall between you two and he had no idea how to tear it down.
"And the rest?" Steve asks after a while. She looks at him with big eyes. Then she tells him the rest of your cover story. Steve looks from her and to the road and then back again. He drops his left hand from the steering wheel and grips her right hand and gives it a squish. He continues watching the road but keeps his hand in hers. He could feel that she went kind of stiff when he gripped her hand, but as long as she did not pull it away he would hold on. He really needed to fix this. He wants his friend back. It was as she was slipping away from him. Slowly, but steadily. She turns her head and looks out the window again and Steve can feel that she is relaxing. They don't say a word and Steve is enjoying the feeling of her delicate hand in his.

After 30 minutes you arrive at the cabin. There is a car parked outside.
"The landlord is supposed to be here and greet us," Steve says and drops your hand. You immediately miss the feel of his hand in yours, but he parks the car and turns it off. He jumps out and walks over to your side fast. He opens the door for you and helps you out. The cold is biting in your cheeks again and before you can put on your gloves, Steve takes your hand again. The heat from his hand warms you up and you look down at your hands. You look up and see that Steve is looking at you. It is hard to read his expression and before you can say anything, the door to the cabin opens and a woman walks out on the steps.
"Welcome to Alaska," the woman greets you. Steve and you greet her with your cover. You let Steve do most of the talking, and try to keep your head in the game. But your mind is wandering to how Steve is acting. It is more like it was before he got cold and distant and you can feel a bit of hope building in your chest. You don't want to have hope just to have it put out again, but at the same time, maybe Bucky was right. Maybe you should talk to Steve.