Collide | August Alsina | on hold indefinitely (unfinished)

nineteen

"Aight well.." He started "Remember how I told you allat shit I was goin through wit my family?"

"Yeah I do"

He cleared his throat "Well tomorrow is my Maw Maws birthday and as much as I want ta be thea for ha I can't bring myself ta do it. The party is at my mamas house and I ain't step foot in the place for almost two years."

"What made you leave?"

"I didn't she put me out ova ha' drug fiend husband and I can't neva get ova no shit like dat. I've always blamed him fa' Mels death because if he wun sucking my Ma's bank accounts dry Mel wouldn't have been in the streets as much as he was." He explained "Then when Mel passed shit got worse my mama was depressed, step pops was using drugs more heavy and spending all ha' money. I can't even name how many times an eviction notice got put on our do'. So I did what I thought I had ta' do and started selling...it was keeping food on the table and a roof ova our heads so it was whateva fa' me"

He looked at Summer as she watched him intently taking in everything that he was saying. He appreciated how she always let him get his thoughts out without intergecting or adding her two cents.

"Anyway when I started getting into trouble wit the law she flipped out on me. She told me if I was gon keep sellin dat shit then I needed ta' get out of ha' house so of course I felt played. Like I'm doing dis shit ta' help you—-us, while my step pops is doin nun but bringing us down..yet I'm the bad guy? One night I caught that nigga hittin' on ha' cause she threw away his stash so I fucked him up. Like I really thought I killed dat mufucka wit my bare hands. She was yelling and me screaming at me ta' stop but I wouldn't so she called the police on me" He sighed "The fucking police...my own mama bruh? Since I had so many racked up charges they ended up locking me up fa' damn nea' six months—I feel like I'm talking too much"

Summer took his hand into hers "No I'm listening keep going"

"Okay well, I was in thea fa' six months and she ain't  neva' visited me or called me to see if I was good. I was only19 then and it was my first time servin dat long of a sentence so I was scared as fuck. Jail is a different type of hell and I almost lost myself in thea. But I stayed strong until I got released, I ain't have no whea ta' go so I was going from couch to couch until I got tired of leeching off people. My pride wouldn't let me go back ta' my mamas spot..I was scared she would turn me away so I didn't let myself go through that rejection. I settled with just being homeless until Cha' found out a few weeks lata and forced me to move in with ha" He said "I love my mama I do, she's my mother at the end of the day but dat don't mean I can look past the shit she's done ta' me"

Wrapping her arms around his torso Summer sighed "I'm so sorry babe you didn't deserve that"

"Yeah I kno, no one does but it's life right? Fuck can I do?"

"Well for starters..I think you should go to your grandmas party. It's not worth missing out on despite your issues with your mom. Plus y'all can't just not talk forever the conversation is bound to happen at some point so I think you should take matters in your own hands and use this as a chance to tell your mom how you feel about the way she treated you. No, y'all might not make up but you need to get this weight off your chest August. I can tell it's been heavy on your mind for the longest and if you do this you'll get some type of relief at least."

"Ion know what I would do without chu honestly" He said kissing her lips "I'a go"

Summers eyes widened at his response, "Really?"

"Only if you come wit a nigga though"

"Aug—"

"Please Summa' I need yo support cause if not I kno I'a back out of it" He begged "Plus I want Cha and my Maw Maw to meet you"