𝔹𝕒𝕔𝕜 / 𝕄𝕚𝕟𝕤𝕦𝕟𝕘

☆1☆

Jisung's POV

The burning sun of the afternoon felt too hot on my skin and pearls of sweat were running down the side of my face after running for who knows how long.
The sound of small waves dashing against the shore and little birds chirping in the trees were the only thing that was able to make me calm down when I stopped and observed the green scenary around me.
In exhaustion, I sat on the wooden footbridge built along a small lake that was well known for going swimming and let my legs hang down so they almost touched the water surface.
Comming here had become something like a ritual any time I felt like life became too much but this time was different.
With a sigh I closed my eyes and let the clear air of spring fill my lungs. My throat felt really dry and I was about to open the water bottle I had brought with me before a silent cough made me turn around.

On a tree trunk right behind me I noticed an old woman that had just sat down there, seeming to struggle with her back. Her hair had grey stripes and stood up from her head like she hadn't washed or brushed it for months. With her wrinkly and dirt stained hands she took her large backpack off and and coughed again. I wondered if she was homeless and tried to not let my perception of her be influenced by the way she looked.
There was a high chance she was here for the same reason I was... because she didn't know where else to go.

I averted my eyes to see the cold water bottle in my hands and looked up at her again. She lured at the bottle like it'd be the most valuable thing on earth so I thought she probably needed it more than I did...
With a smile I reached out my hand to offer her the drink.

"You can have it. I don't need to drink" I said as kindly as possible and the woman took the bottle in an instant without even looking at me or changing her grumpy expression. She opened it and drank in big sips.

When she was finished she gave it back to me and silently mumbled a "Thanks" before she leaned on her backpack and closed her eyes.

Her behaviour was undoubtedly rude but at least she thanked me so I let it slide for that moment. I had much worse things to worry about at the moment so I turned around  again expecting her to ignore me. A person to talk wouldn't change my problems anyway... nothing could change the miserable situation I was in.

It had all started when most of my friends moved away or were too busy studying at universities so I was left as the untalented friend who needed to work at a fashion shop. Back then the lonelyness had almost driven me to do really bad things but then I met San and his friends and started slowly having my life back under controll. He had become my boyfriend rather quickly so he had always been there for me when nothing else seemed to work and as long as I could hold his hand I felt save and knew that there was at least one person in this world that loved me.
That was until yesterday. We had planned to meet at a café near the city center and I was there a little earlier so unfortunately I had to witness him making out with some bitchy dressed chic in an ally right next to the café.
At first I wanted to talk to him about it but San had already pushed me away from his life. That bastard took the money he had used me for and ran away with it. Even his friends that I considered to be mine too all turned their backs on me. Seriously it had felt so unreal and from one our to the other I was suddenly a nobody again.

There was not a single soul on this earth that actually cared about my existance.

"Han Jisung, what have you done that your life could change so badly in just two days?" I said quietly whispering to myself.
What was this feeling of helplessness?
I ran out of money, was fired from my job for being framed with another's mistake and soon I'd end up on the streets like that old woman.

Closing my eyes again I tried to get other thoughts into my head and first figure out a way to pay my bills this month but suddenly a loud scream was breaking the silence.

"HELP HE- HELP ME PLEEAASE". Panic spread to my whole body when I saw a young boy kicking and fighting to stay on the surface and not swallow the green water of the lake.
I scanned the area around us but there was not a single soul here except for me and the woman. When did the boy even show up and why did he jump into the water if he couldn't swim?! I couln't swim that good myself! I wasn't sure what to do so I turned around to the old woman and shouted at her with my voice cracking.

"Don't you want to do anything?!" but she was asleep or maybe she pretended to be... SHIT.

Then I noticed something, there was silence again. No screams. No splashing in the water.

"FUCK!" was what escaped my mouth when I saw small bubbles on the spot on the water surface where the boy had struggled a few seconds ago.

"AHHH SHIT!". I took my shirt off and jumped into the cold water. The sudden freezing cold let me cringe but I kept diving deeper until I was able to get a hold of the boys hand. Through the clouded lake water I was barely able to see anything and my started burning.

I was already out of breath but with the last bit of strength I pushed him up so we broke through the surface again. The boy immediately started coughing and held onto me while I had difficulties keeping him up.

Gladly a grown man was already swimming in our direction. He was probably his father and before I handed the boy over to him he gave me an angry stare and spat something like. "Hands of my son!"

Seriously... why did everyone hate me?

"You're welcome!" I shouted after the two and wanted to swim to the bridge again but suddenly something stopped me from moving further.
"What the fuck is it now?" Annoyed from everything and everyone I tried to free myself from whatever had caught my foot in the water but suddenly an incredibly strong force pulled me down.
I didn't even have the time to take a deep breath and no matter how much I fought it, nothing changed.
The pressure on my ears send a stinging pain through my head but when I looked down in the deep green abyss there was nothing visible that could've pulled me down.

I was simply floating there...

My legs and arms weren't moving no matter what I did and cold water was slowly filling my lungs. Although I was drowning I felt calm. Was this how it would end? What purpose did I have on this earth anyway? Nobody would notice if the brown haired weird guy next door was missing... nobody would shed a tear over me... but still... I didn't want it to end like this... I didn't want to have a death that was as meaningless as my life.
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