Irresistible [h.s]

Chapter 16

I pull away, looking in his eyes "I'm fine, but right now I need you, so can we please just forget about this for now and just cuddle" I suggest, sending him a small smile, before laying down and looking at him with my eyebrows raised.

He lays down next to me, looking down at me, I then rest my head on his chest, with my arm over his stomach, immediately relaxing.

"What time is it?" I blurt out.

He lets out a loud sigh "like three in the morning"

"Oh well let's just go back to sleep then okay?"
I say, rubbing my eyes.

"I'm waiting till you fall asleep" he tells me, putting his hand in my hair, starting to run through it. I then look up at him with my eyebrows furrowed.

"No don't do that-"

"Shhh" He drags out. He lightly chuckles. Rolling my eyes, I put my head back on his chest closing my eyes, then soon after falling asleep.

-

I wake up practically on top of Harry, he's still breathing even though I'm probably crushing him.

I go to sit up and Harry reaches over and grabs my waist and pulls me in against him.

I look over at him and I notice how relaxed he looks, he looks so peaceful. I can't help but reach over and put my hands in his curls and start to run my hands through his hair.

I feel extremely bad with what Harry had to see. I haven't sleep walked in a long time, I usually just have nightmares but nothing more than that. I really didn't even want him knowing about my nightmares.

But oddly enough I'm not as scared about him knowing as I was before. I'm petrified but just not as much as I was before. Things have moved pretty fast between us but it's just so natural, it's not forced.

Sometimes I think what the fuck am I doing, why is he different? Why did I let myself feel something for him? Was it a mistake? I try pushing that off, and enjoy being with him.

I haven't changed who I am, or the person I am, I've just learned to let my guard down a tiny bit and not let good people slip away, or at least that's what I'm trying to do. In some weird way I'm still against relationships and falling for people but here I am, doing the opposite of what I've always said.

A part of me says don't let him go, and be with him, and let myself fall for him, but then another part of me says he's going to hurt me, and I should let him go. That I don't deserve him and people like me don't go well with relationships. It's pretty complicated.

It's like the bitch and broken part inside of me is fighting with me trying to be a good person and let myself feel. It's very confusing and stressful.

But let's be honest, I'm completely broken. It's not just a small part of me.

I'm trying to listen to Zoe and take her advice but it's hard. I've always pushed people away the second they started caring or I did. So it's like I have this little voice in my head telling me to let him go and push him away like I've always done, but I can't. I can't say I never will though.

What a pain in the ass that little voice is. She's such a bitch.

I snap out of my thoughts and I'm still running my fingers through Harry's hair. I check the time and it's eight in the morning.

I look down at Harry and feel slightly bad that I'm going to wake him up. I start to smile thinking of a way to wake him.

I gently kiss his forehead "Harry wake up" I whisper.