iii. 𝖎𝖌𝖔𝖗
act i. chapter three.
❛ i think ❜
LOVE. What even is love? Have I ever even experienced real love or is what I'm feeling for Layla truly love? I keep asking myself if I love Layla. It's been racing through my mind ever since we started dating.
It's weird. Seeing her as I pass her in the hallways on my way to whatever class it is with whatever professor, it's exhilarating. Knowing that I'm able to love her properly. Like I've been hit by a wave of nauseating vertigo that leaves my head spinning for days.
Even now, as I stand in front of the vending machine trying to pick a snack for when I wake up randomly, all I can think about is the same thing that I've been thinking about for days. Do I love her?
"Isn't that your friend? What's her name again? June?" It was only a faint whisper at first before it had gradually grown into a bellowing tone. I turned to look and was greeted with a sight that instantly made my eyes blaze all shades of my ugly green friend.
Friend?
"Oh... hey Layla. Hey Adam." I offered him a pathetic excuse of a greeting as I shifted on my feet uncomfortable at the sight, my eyes never leaving Layla's. Of course they were together. "What are you guys up to?"
It was a completely harmless question and a polite way of keeping this god awful conversation going to Adam. But to Layla it was my endangering curiosity getting the better of me.
"Oh! We were just—"
"Studying." Layla cut Adam off sharply, leaving nothing but awkwardness and an odd sense of tension in her wake. I stared down Layla as I searched her eyes for some sense of reassurance.
Layla gave me an easy-going smile, though it did little to calm the raging nerves that left my senses more heightened.
This is what she wanted, right? Did she want me feeling so uncontrollably unsteady and jumpy? If so, what the fuck is her motive? What's the reason for me to love her? Why? Did she want this?
"Well..." Adam spoke up, efficiently drawing the attention to himself. "It was nice officially meeting you, June but it's getting kinda late."
"It's Juniper." I corrected him, trying my best to keep the venom out of my tone; I had already failed that task though. "Bye."
"Bye June." Layla had said softly as she gave me a fleeting kiss. Nothing to crazy but a peck small enough to make my knees buckle from underneath me.
Her and Adam soon faded from sight leaving me in a catatonic state as my mind reeled from the absence of her presence. I could feel what felt like a volcanic eruption in my stomach, leaving me to feel like a starved animal. What was this? This new feeling? I had never felt such annoying sensations before and it was giving me whiplash. Do I know what this is? I've never heard of such a symptom and it was throwing me for a loop. Until an epiphany hit me and I knew what this was.
I think I'm in love, this time I think it's for real. All those other petty girlfriends had never left me as breathless as Layla has. Just a whiff of her sweet strawberry scent is enough to leave me in a trance.
She must know I love her. Right? But what if she doesn't? How do I tell her? Oh my god, how do I tell her I love her if it wasn't clear before?
What an awful realization to come to. My mind is complete and utter chaos when it comes to her wavy brown locks that fall just above her waist
How can I tell her? How can I tell her?
All I can think about is her sweet and mellifluous laughter that sounds like bells sent straight from heaven.
How can I tell her? How can I tell her?
She would say it back, right? She would tell me she feels the same? I mean, Adam would go for someone else once he saw that Layla could never love him like she loves me. Right? Right.
With stone cold conviction in my bones, I turned my attention back to the vending machine and chose Sour-patch Kids.
