The Death of Love

Chapter 1

Is death a question or a statement I have been in this stupid room for to long to even tell you at this point, of course I seem like I pity myself to much, but you would to if you were dying. Only at age 12 I was diagnosed with a brain tumor that is now to big for the doctors to do anything about so I am just enjoying my remaining year in a white hospital room. My mom has stopped visiting me and my dad left before I was born, so I guess I can understand why she doesn't want to be around the girl she doesn't want to love anymore. I still have dreams about what death will be like when I leave this world and in everyone of my dreams I am in a different world with a boy named Arris, he was is kind of like my spirit of death. 

Arris has been one of my only  friends through it all even if he is imaginary I can still say I have a friend in real life too; named Sammy a boy with Cystic fibrosis, he still has not gotten his lung transplant and has been waiting for about 5 years. We have known each other since I first arrived at the hospital at one of the "Get Better Soon" meetings that are held every month here so they try to get all the dying patents to go. Sammy at least has his mom and dad in his life though, but they are always working so they can only come once a week and they treat me like their own daughter most of the time. We were able to convince nurse Kelly to let us have rooms beside each other and she had to pull a lot of strings to make that happen. If you can't find me and Sammy in our rooms we are probably trying to sneak out or we are in each others rooms, which is where I am now.

"Danny! Are you even listening to me?" NO, but I wasn't going to tell Sammy that so I just nodded my head. He usually gets mad thinking I don't care about him even though he knows I love him like a brother. "Well there is a new boy and Kelly was telling me he is supper hot, so I was thinking we do a 'friendly' drop by his room and get to know him."

"Of course you were thinking that all you want to do is get back a Owen for breaking up with you over the summer in your crazy on and off again relationship." I said making him blush, but that could have been because he was chocking on his water too. "Do we have too though, we will probably just meet him in one of Wesley's secret parties in the cafeteria."

"Come on Dan you need a guy just as much as I do," he has been doing this whole cupid act since we were 14 when he finally came out of the closet as gay. "Please! I don't want to go alone just in case he is rude or has homophobia like some people here, so I will need a quick escape route."

"Why do you always use that as an excuse to try and make me meet new people? Sam you have been trying to get me a boy friend for the last 3 years when I probably wont even make it the next 6 months." He had a sad look on his face, but it is what we all expect so I try not to get attached to too many people. 

"Stop being a Debby Downer, Kelly told me they are working on a new research to see if lasers can kill cancerous cells in the soft tissues of the head and skin maybe that could answer your prayers of living the next 60 years of your life." He knows I hate false hope because I have had so much to last a life time with people always telling me I will make it and beat cancer, but those have all been lies. "Now come on get your lazy butt up and I will find my mask before we go."

"Ugh you're such a butt head!" he laughed and started searching around on his med cart that I just organized last week looking for the mask Kelly makes him wear if we go past the East wing cause that's were a lot of Cystic Fibrosis people are, and if Sammy was to get their sickness too he would die.

"Lets go girl I wanna meet the new man candy," I laughed at what he said as I grabbed my air tank bag and he grabbed his fluid drip so we could leave.

We walked down the hall passing several rooms until we got to the desk where our favorite nurse is on the computer in deep thought. Kelly has been working at this hospital for 10 years after she wanted to help other kids with cancer and deadly diseases when her daughter Camry died of Leukemia. Kelly is a very skinny pale woman with blond hair that is always worn in a pony tail and the same baby blue scrubs that she probably has 20 pairs of. She has become part of my hospital family too, when I first met her I thought she was just some nurse who hates children but I soon found out she was like me and didn't want to get attached to the ones you might lose.