When Did I Change?

Confessions and flashbacks

It was one of those days when Hatake Kakashi was unusually bored. He hadn't had a few missions in a while. While strangely the Icha Icha paradise didn't seem as appealing as it used to be.

This is what caused the silverette sensei to slowly walk into his childhood home. The front of the garden was overgrown with weeds and stinging nettles but he could still see the rose Bush him and his father had planted on his mother's birthday for her memorial.

Although Kakashi had never met his mother due to complications at birth, he had always felt a comfort in old photographs and stories that his father had told him about her as he grew up. He remembered when his father was on a mission and his little self had a nightmare. The young boy ran into his dad's room with tears rolling down his face to find his dad's bed empty and cold. The main thing he remembered was climbing into the bed hugging the pillow, grabbing a picture of his mother and father and talking to her. Kakashi had always believed that no matter where the other was, even if you spoke so softly that they will eventually hear your words. And he knew that night when he was cold and alone, he knew his mother was listening to him. Silently soothing him through his tears.

Shaking his head slightly, the ex ANBU walked up to the doorway and reached for the rusted handle. He never had a key but due to these years, the door had become rusted and the hinges had broken slightly causing him easy access. He bit his bottom lip. Hesitating for a minute, the short man pushed the door open to reviel a dimly lit hallway connecting to the stairs and kitchen. 'How long has it been mother? Father? I'm sorry I should have visited sooner.'

Taking a few steps into his old home, many memories that he thought he had forgotten flooded into his head.

~Flashback~
"Daddy! Daddy look what I made! Do you like it?" Kakashi squealed as he ran into his fathers open arms. The toddler held Up a small toilet roll tube covered in silver glitter and macaroni pasta glued onto it.
A small bush of silver hair invaded the older man's vision before he carefully grasped the small tube from his son and grinned. "Its wonderful kashi! You have a real talent for crafting! You know... I can't even draw a shoe. You get your talent from mummy." The cardboard tube was wet and sticky from the mass amount of PVA glue and slightly squishy. But Sakumo Hatake couldn't love it any less. His only son had made it to the best of his ability and he was extremely proud of him.
With the grin still plastered on his face, Sakumo Hatake picked up his son in one arm and squeezed the tiny child into his broad chest making Kakashi to fidget. "Daaaadddy! Your squishing me and Mr glitter!"
"Am I really? Well I'm terribly sorry but I can't let you two go yet. And do you know why?" The elder asked with a wide smile that stretched across his face. Kakashi made a small face which wrinckled his nose slightly.
"Why nooot?" The smaller silverette asked inoocently as he peered up at his dad who just looked down then kissed his sons soft silver hair.
"Because it's not everyday I get a day off and we are going to celebrate with ice cream!"

~End of Flashback~

Chuckling at the memory, Kakashi wondered into the small living room to find 'mr glitter' on the mantle piece. Cringing slightly the man picked up the piece of slop. He had to admit... He was rather bad at arts and crafts. 'Liar.' He thought with a small smile on his face.

The room was small and incredibly dusty. It was times like these when he appreciated his mask. Not only his nose his whole body was incredibly sensitive which causes him to be sick more often than not. That's why after his fathers death he decided to wear one because he knew his daddy wouldn't be there to keep the nasty germs away.

"Maybe it's time to come home? I could restore the whole house to its former glory?" The silverette spoke to himself as one of his hands drifted to his abdomen. Smiling widely, Kakashi moved his hands in small circles almost automatically. No one besides Gai really knew about his pregnancy since it was so early. Not even his team.

"Maa maa I'll tell them sooner or later." He chuckled. Turning around Kakashi walked up the stairs into his old bedroom. Everything was exactly where it was meant to be as the last time he saw this room. Other than some of his old clothes he had to take when he left.

Kneeling, Kakashi looked under his old bed to find a small set of his very first kunai and shuriken. They were slightly rusted and blunt but he clutched them tightly to his chest. They had been his mothers and they had been given to him when he graduated the academy.

~Flashback~
"Father! Father! I did it... I finally graduated before my class!" Six year old Kakashi shouted as he ran and hugged his dad. Even though the famous White Fang of Konoha had been busy with mission these few months he had made sure he could at least be there for his son at his graduation. It's not everyday your son was the youngest in Konoha history to ever graduate the ninja academy.
"I'm so proud of you kashi." He smiled as he gave a small hug to his only son. Knowing if he hugged him too long he would complain about embarrassing him in front of his 'crush' Mitzuki Hyuga.
"Dad... Well. There's a picture that has to be done and you have to sign these so I can officially become a chunin... So well..." Kakashi mumbled. He hated asking things from his father. But no matter what he asked for his dad always managed to get it for him.
"Of course I'll sign them and be in the picture. Kashi. You have no idea of how proud I am of you." Sakumo declared getting a little emotional. 'Sara? Are you as proud of our son as I am? I hope so.'
"Daaad your a battle hardened ninja! Don't cry!" Kakashi flailed almost dropping his papers causing Sakumo to chuckle.
"Kashi. Since this is a big day I would like to give you something..." He gave a small but genuine smile and handed something a little heavy , covered in crinckled Brown paper in the small boys arms.
The other silverette eyed his dad curiously then carefully un wrapped the small bundle. Much to his suprise he found an old kunai set. He looked up shocked and clutched them tightly. "This is the best thing ever thank you daddy!"
It wasn't everyday that Kakashi called Sakumo daddy in public which made the older males heart clench his happieness as he ruffled soft silver locks that belonged to his son. "I wanted to give them to you at the right time. They were your mother's. I'm sure she would want me to give them to you too."
~End of Flashback~

That was probably the last time he had seen his father truly smile before that night. Shaking his head, the silverette looked back at the time of his father's untimely death.
Until Next Time