Learning to Love Yourself

Chapter 1 - The Anniversary

Waking up every day is a struggle, I'm not a morning person or a day person for that matter. I prefer the night time, my brothers call me nocturnal and they aren't wrong there. Anyway, hello my names Brooklyn Montague and I'm 17. I live with my 3 brothers Jake who's 21, Adam who's 19 and Andrew who's 17. I'm the baby of the family although I'm only a few minutes younger than Andrew which he just loves to remind me.

"Come on Brook, you're gonna be late!" That's the first thing I heard while being shaken awake. Andy was the one who sadly had the job of waking me up this morning. I mean after what happened yesterday it's probably the best. You see my other brothers can be very, what's the word? Creative? Yeah, that's it, they can be very creative when it comes to trying to wake someone up. Yesterday Adam decided he would throw a bucket of ice water over me. Let's just say he ended up with a black eye.

"No!" With that, I curled back into my cocoon and tried to fall asleep. It didn't last long though.

"Brooklyn. Up. Now!" Okay, he used my first name, that definitely got my attention. Signing I sat up, rubbed my eyes and stretched. Looking over at the alarm clock it read 7 am. What the fuck?!

"It's only 7! I don't have to be in college till 9!" I swear to all thing he holds dear I'm going to murder whoever thought it would be a good idea to wake me up so early. That's when I looked at Andy's' face. Something was wrong... He wasn't smiling at me like he usually is when he's trying to wake me up. For some context, he finds it amusing how grumpy I am in the morning.

"What's wrong Andy? Who do I have to stab with a spoon?" He didn't answer, instead opting to stand up and walk to my door. I don't like seeing my twin upset, he deserves to always wear a smile. "Andrew?" Once again, he didn't answer and this had me worrying. "I swear to all that's good in the world if you don't answer me, Andrew, I'm going to dye all your clothes pink!" Luckily that got his attention and he turned around and scowled at me.

This is a side to him that I've only ever really seen once or twice. Both times I hated it because both times I was the one who he was upset with.

The first time I saw this side of him was when his girlfriend broke up with him just after their 1-year anniversary. I will admit that was maybe my fault... but she wasn't good enough for him anyway. I found her sleeping around with his best friend the night after their anniversary when I confronted her about it, she got defensive and the next day she broke it off with him. Told him that she didn't want to be dating someone who's sister was spreading rumours about them. Let's just say that he wasn't happy with me for a long while.

The one and only other time I have ever seen this side of him was the day our parents died... They were on their way back from a date night that I had set up for them. I thought it would be a nice night out for them since they had been working so hard on making mine and Andy's birthday special for us since we were turning 13. Official teenagers! Anyway, while they were walking home, they were killed in a hit and run. My dad was killed on impact, my mother, on the other hand, was in the ICU for a week or so before she succumbed to her injuries. That was four years ago and none of us are really over it. Even though they say they don't blame me I know secretly that they do, especially Andy.

"Just get up Brook and hurry up, I'm not being late for college today" With that he turned and made his leave, leaving me to sit there wondering what I had done wrong this time. That's when I saw the date on my alarm clock. Tuesday the 7th of May.

So that's why he's so moody.

It's our parent's anniversary.

Every year Andy goes to their graves after dropping me off at college and stays there till the end of the college day. Usually, I would go later in the day, sometimes in the evening so that I could spend time alone with them. On days like this, I tend to try to avoid my brothers, I know it's my fault that our parents are gone... they shouldn't have had to grow up without their parents just because their little sister told them to go out and enjoy themselves.