all strings attached || n.h au

part five

Kyra let herself in with the key Niall gave her a few months ago. She toed off her shoes and placed it neatly next to Niall's and made her way down the hall to the living room where she found Niall sitting on the couch with his laptop perched on his lap. He's wearing his glasses and Kyra had to remind herself that they're not exactly in the place where she could throw herself to him and kiss him senseless. They had things to talk about.

He didn't seem to notice her so she cleared her throat. He looked up briefly before he returned his attention back to his laptop.

"I brought back dessert." She told him, to which he responded with a nod as he continued typing. If she had to guess, she'd say he's emailing his international clients. She took a seat on the single couch and said, "So, I think we need to talk."

Niall stopped typing. "Nothing to talk about."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Bullshit."

Niall pressed his lips together. When his eyes met hers, Kyra gripped at the arm of the couch, afraid to hear what he's about to say. "I get it now," he began. "I get why you'd want to keep us a secret."

"What?"

Putting aside his laptop, Niall ran his palms over his thighs before he continued, "You were hoping Ryan would come back into your life. He's your the one that got away anyway and now that he's back, you could end this thing between us and it'd be a clean breakup because no one knows about us so you won't have to explain to everyone why we're over. You want an easier breakup. That's why you wanted to keep it a secret."

"Wow," was all Kyra could say.

"I'm right, aren't I?" Niall picked up his laptop and resumed his work like he didn't just say something that could potentially end their relationship. Unless... unless he thought it was already over.

"I'm hurt that you think so little of me. I'm hurt that you think I'm keeping us a secret because of him," Kyra said after she'd taken a few deep breaths. "But more than anything, I'm hurt that you think after everything we've gone through, I'd still be pining over that stupid Ryan."

Niall looked up from his laptop, brows furrowing. "Then why're you keeping it a secret? You're ashamed of me?"

"Oh my God," Kyra got up from the couch and started pacing around the living room. "One ridiculous thing after another. What's next? You're gonna question me about whether or not I really love you?" When he remained silent and guilt clouded his face, Kyra could almost scream. But she didn't. She pressed her lips together and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Okay, let me remind you that we both agreed from the beginning that it should be kept a secret."

"Yes. But I didn't think it'd have to be kept secret this long."

He got a point, but Kyra's not going to admit that. She had gotten so comfortable with living in their own bubble where she thought no one could get in between them, so much so that she failed to take into consideration what Niall must have felt and thought about all the secrecy. Sure it was mutually agreed at first but overtime he started to show signs that he's tired of keeping it a secret but she disregarded it. Always telling him just a little bit longer or just until I'm sure people won't freak about us when the truth is, she's the one who'd freak out. She worried so much about what people would think of them and now look where it got them.

"Look," Kyra breathed out and stopped pacing, "The reason why I kept – yes, kept, because I told my parents about us before I left – us a secret, apart from the obvious reason which was my brother, is because I'm scared that I'd ruin it the moment we start telling people we're dating. And I'm scared that our relationship would change once everyone else found out and... Now it's already ruined and none of my reasons mattered anymore."