It Wasn't Supposed To End This Way (A Starkid Fan Fiction)

Chapter 55-Falling in Love & Loving Someone are Different

With a minute to spare I've showered, done my hair, clothed myself and put on make-up with earrings. I grab my phone and see I've missed a text from Clark.

Clark: Miss you already. Sorry I'm not there for tonight :(

Alex: It's alright, love, we're together the rest of the week.

It's not really okay.

I'm hitting send on a 'I love you' text to Clark when my front door sounds of knocks. I look in the mirror near the door and check my reflection. Then, I open the door. 

Before I can even say hi or a word can be said at all, Dylan pushes his way in. 

"Hi to you too," I say before closing the door and turning around to him.

"Did you take my dalmane?"

His forwardness scares me slightly, the unexpectedness of his question throwing me off. Take his dalmane? No, I didn't take any of the pills, I took the empty bottle.

"No, no I never took any of it."

"Well, I mean, a bunch of them go missing every time I make a new purchase and my doctor threatened to cut me off, saying that I'm going to overdose." He runs his hands through his hair. "I don't know what to do, I didn't take too many and she thinks I'm like, losing it or something..."

I tense slightly. "You're not taking more than you should?"

Dylan turns his head to me. "No...? Why would I? My doctor gives me fifty pills and I should be going through them at most in three weeks because I don't need them every night. Insomnia isn't constant for everyone, it varies. Lately though, I can't sleep, I'm having problems. And I need the pills to sleep at night. And before you say I'm an addict, I'm not because I only usually take them twice to three times a week, four at the absolute most. We've been coming home so late from the show's that I haven't needed them every night, but last night I realized I only have three pills left and I just got my order two weeks ago. And I've barely needed them compared to the usual sleep-less week."

I get Dylan a water bottle from my fridge, the sweat beading down his face quickly. It's been a pretty hot May this year, and with Dylan stressing about the pills, he looks like he's ready to pass out. He takes it and chugs half the bottle before I speak.

"I promise, I didn't do this."

He wipes his forehead and takes a seat on my light blue couch. He stares at the wall, shaking his head slightly. "I don't get it."

I sit down next to Dylan, turning the idea over in my head whether or not to tell him I A) Called his doctor and found out about the pills and B) Took his empty pill bottle and suspected he was taking too many pills, also.

I choose the latter.

"When I was at your place, when I brought you home from the birthday party, I saw the empty pill case on the floor. I also saw," I turn to Dylan. "The date when you ordered it. And there weren't any pills in the bottle when you got the prescription filled a week before."

He looks up at me from the floor, his eyes piercing. He looks like his J'afar persona for a second. Then, he hangs his head and sighs loudly. "Okay. Okay obviously it's not like I can lie myself out of this. I'll be honest with you Alex. I hate when I can't sleep. I hate when I lie awake at three am staring up at my ceiling or when I do sleep I hate the nightmares that wake me up every hour. I hate that during post-Denise I was taking pills to sleep every night and that when your appendix burst I didn't sleep for two days straight, even with the pills. I hate that my father is dead and that my mother doesn't talk about him anymore, and I hate that through all of this I'm supposed to pretend I'm okay. I'm not okay, but I'm not a liar. I'm not overdosing on pills, I'm not selling my pills. I'm losing them. They disappear and I don't know where they go because if I did I wouldn't be here right now."