Right By Your Side ~ Larry Stylinson

Chapter 17: Can't give you up

The problem was, he was unhappy without Louis too.

It was early days though, he told himself. And maybe it was too soon to tell if he could move on or not. He decided that maybe he should give himself some time to get used to being without Louis before making major decisions about his future.

He kept going round and round in circles in his mind until he was too frustrated to stay in bed, and pulled out his laptop. Louis would still be on the plane, and Harry wondered if he was feeling the same emptiness that he was feeling – if he was missing Harry as much as Harry missed him already.

He pulled up his photo gallery, a small smile materialising as he scrolled through photos of the two of them, as well as the many he had snapped of just Louis. He ran his fingers over Louis' features, at the smiling eyes and the face that had become so dear to him. As he pulled up one of his particular favourites, one of Louis and Lux, making a funny face at the camera, he felt his wounded heart give a painful stutter. God he loved this man, loved him with everything he had, with every fibre of his being.

He just wasn't sure he could give up the career he loved to be with him. Could he?

He made himself a tea and showered, still no closer to the answer. He decided to put it in the "too hard" basket for now and got dressed for work.

After breakfast, which he neglected to eat, Niall drove them to work and Harry stared out the window, lost in his own thoughts. Niall was side-eyeing him warily, but refrained from asking him if he was alright – he knew he wasn't. It was going to take some time, so he let his friend be.

After walking Harry to the office, Niall gave him a tight hug before he proceeded to the feed rooms. "It'll work out Harry" he said softly. "Chin up, yeah?"

Harry nodded sadly and headed into the office to get ready for his day. Ian was there, and greeted Harry with a sympathetic smile. Harry had sent him a text the night before, confirming he'd made it to the airport in time and Ian had offered for him to take today off, but he'd decided it would be better to be at work and try to take his mind off things.

"How are you Harry?" Ian asked.

Harry shrugged. "Not sure really. I'm a bit numb right now, I guess. I miss him already though."

Ian nodded. "That's understandable Harry, give it time and things will ease, I'm sure."

Harry murmured a non-committal response and proceeded into the change room to get ready for the day. Ian watched him go, sighing at how pale and drawn he looked.

When Harry had changed into his wetsuit, he headed down to Candy's pool and couldn't resist a small smile when she sped over to swim alongside him as he walked along the boardwalk.

"Hey girl" he said as he kicked off his thongs and lay down on the deck, head resting on his hands as he leaned his forehead out over the water. Candy swam up, almost bumping him on the nose and squeaking at him.

Harry sighed. "I miss him Candy" he told her. "I miss him so much it hurts." He flicked his fingers back and forth lazily through the water as he spoke.

Almost as if she could sense his sadness, she let out a low whistling sound, before laying back and presenting her tummy to him. He smiled softly and stroked her underside lightly back and forth.

"You'd never leave me, would you girl?" he asked stroking her and then lifting his hand as she spun upright again.

When he lay there getting lost in his own head again, Candy swam away, returning a moment later to splash him with her fin as she sped past.