Carry On, Blissey

Staff Meeting

I should be out there helping patients. Not loafing around on a chair with other members of staff. Domino decided to have the day off, so I had to attend a meeting in her place. It was mainly the human senior management with their dull suits and fancy shoes. The chunky man in the corner of the room needs to straighten up his lilac tie. The man next to him could do with a decent meal and smaller clothes. The lady sitting next to me needs to wash that crap off her face.

"I want to thank you all for attending this meeting," the skinny man said. "Unfortunately, Nurse Joy can't make it this afternoon so we have Matron Blissey instead."

"So what is this meeting about?" I asked. "Nurse Joy was so busy, she never really got to explain it to me."

"That's okay," the skinny man said again as his head bowed over his knees. "I'm Hank, the assistant manager and this is Arthur, our area manager. Now we're about to discuss some new findings following a research project down in Orre."

"For many years we've been wondering why female nidorans lose their fertility after evolution," Hank announced. "And it seems we finally know what it is."

"Do you know about the Polycystic Ovary Syndrome?"

"Women can have that," I said. "It leads to all sort of problems for women who have it."

"We believe that female nidorans also have PCOS," Arthur announced. He picked up the board against his leg and held it towards his chest. "These pictures show the reproductive system of a nidorina and a nidoqueen. As you can see the ovaries have a lot of cysts and these can lead to infertility, and that's why nidorina and nidoqueen can't breed."

"This makes a lot of sense," one of the ladies said as her peers gasped in unison. I don't see what's so mind-blowing about it, I already had a feeling that would be why female nidorans lose their fertility as soon as they evolve. Well, at least the humans found something educating. I think that it will probably break the news and there will be less nidorina and nidoqueens about.

The meeting was interrupted by a loud scream. It sounded as if it was coming from Domino's office. It sounded like the cry of a woman who had lost their child. The screams continued, and it grated my ears. I hopped off the chair and bowed at the men. "Excuse me," I said. "It's been nice meeting you, but I must go and see what's going on in Nurse Joy's office."

"That sound is from her office?" Hank asked. Arthur and their peers rose from their seats.

"It is," I said.

"Oh dear," Hank said. "I hope she is okay."

"PHIONE!" I followed the sound of Domino's cries and as I did, I began to decode what Domino was yelling. It was a state of emergancy, and I didn't have time to tell the higher management to stop following me. I opened the door to Domino's office and as the doors slammed open, her crying stopped. Unlike Domino's medical qualifications, her distress was real.

"Nurse Joy!" Hank gasped. "What is wrong with your hands."

"I couldn't save it," Domino cried. She held out her head hands and underneath all the blood was a piece of something. I scurried under the table and felt the urge to vomit. Below Domino's desk was a stillborn phione surrounded by blood and egg shells. The small corpse was badly deformed and decomposed. Poor child must have contracted the Hacked Syndrone by birth which could explain it's deflated body, and it's mangled and rotten state was proof that the egg was not stored in a safe place. The egg must have been kept in a damp area where bacteria thrives and allows pests to feast upon the poor fetus.

"What is it?" Hank asked.

"It's a stillborn phione," I announced. I gulped and swallowed both my own vomit and anger. Hank leaned over my head and rushed out of the room. He held onto his mouth and I knew he was running to the nearest bathroom to expel his sickness. I looked up to the higher management and said, "Can you get funeral directors and the appropriate paperwork please? Thank you. I will speak to Nurse Joy alone."

They all left and nodded without another word. As soon as Arthur closed the door after him, I double-slapped Domino three times and she panted at every hit. There was no holding back. I had done something that I had been wanting to do for a while.

"You killed a baby," I hissed at Domino. I glared at her as her chest protected one side of the cabinet.

"I wanted a shiny phione," Domino whimpered.

"What are you hiding in there?" My cheeks imploded and I tapped her gently in hope she would surrender.

"Nothing important."

"Well if it's nothing important, then why can't I see it?"

"It's none of your business."

"JUST LET ME IN!" I had no choice, I pushed Domino out of the way and opened the wooden door. The door spat out a nail as it hinged open. The cabinet was scattered with drugs: illegal drugs and strange concoctions along with those Instant Egg Drops. I pushed the door shut and looked down on Domino who threw herself on the ground as if she was expecting some sympathy. "I always knew that Instant Egg Drops were dangerous," I barked. "But now, I can see the true dangers of it."

"None of this would have happened if you accepted me as your master," Domino yelled. She pushed herself from the floor and her pink wig slipped off. Domino looked as if she had a hungover from a wild hen night. It seems as if I didn't slap the murderer enough. How dare she try to guilt trip me. The stillborn phione makes me even more glad that I didn't accept Domino as my trainer.

"You have gone far enough," I told Domino. "If you stay here any longer, you will kill many more of my patients." I turned my back on her. "I will turn you in and I will reveal the truth."

"NO MATRON!" Domino cried. "One more chance... please... I beg you."

Rubbish! She had plenty of chances to redeem herself and she took none of them. Every second she spent working in the wards was a chance to make herself a better person, but she chose profit over humanity. I hope I never see the wretched woman again.

"SPEAK TO ME!" I ignored her again and threw my attention to Officer Jenny who followed Hank into the room. Domino pushed herself against the wall. "What are the police doing here?" If Domino was a real nurse, she would have known that when a pokemon dies in suspicious circumstances it is the police's duty to perform a routine check.

"Nurse Joy is quite shocked," Hank explained to Officer Jenny.

"She would be," I interrupted. "She didn't expect her experiment to be such a failure."

"You stupid fat bitch!" Domino screamed out her true colours.

"I'm sorry Domino," I told her. I didn't care if there was an audience. It was time for the truth to be out in the open. "But I'm not going to stand there and let you get away with killing my patients."

"Don't tell them," Domino screamed. "Don't you dare..."

"Tell them what?" I asked with my hands on my hips. "Don't tell them that you lied about your qualifications? You don't want them to know that you're a member of Team Rocket? Or do you not want them to know that you've imported illegal drugs into the hospital." I paused and then looked up to Officer Jenny and told her in a sincere manner, "Feel free to check this office."

"With pleasure," Officer Jenny announced. She blew her whistle and the room became surrounded by speedy growlithes. Meanwhile Hank looked at Domino with a disappointed look on his face as Domino was dragged out of the hospital by Officer Jenny.