Only You (Matty Healy/George Daniel)

33: Pull Me Out

"I..." George chokes back another round of sobs as he relives what just happened. "I hurt him...I - I..."

"It's alright George, I'll go check on him," John cuts in, seeming to know exactly who George is talking about without the need for an actual name. George nods his head gratefully in response. Matty needs someone with him if he wakes up - George needs to be with him, but he can't bear that. He doesn't deserve to be in Matty's presence anymore, not even to attempt to fix his mistakes.

"Stay with him please, at least until tomorrow...I don't want him waking up alone," George asks.

"I will," John promises solemnly before he disappears out the door with one last look behind him. George silently thanks the world for blessing him with such wonderful friends. Without them, he'd be lost, and he's truly grateful he has them. If he was more coherent, he'd voice this aloud, but he's not, so he stays quiet.

"Come on mate, let's get you in bed before you pass out on the tiles," Ross suggests.

George doesn't answer with words, but he does allow Ross to help him to his feet. His stomach churns violently as he gains vertical height, but he manages to keep his gag reflex from reacting too violently. It's not like he's got anything left to throw up anyway. He leans heavily on Ross as he exits the bathroom, his vision dancing wildly as he tries to hold his own weight with minimal success.

"I'm sorry," George mumbles quietly as Ross helps him into one of the two beds taking up most of the space in the room.

"No need to apologize, I'm always here for you - you know that."

"I - thank you," George chokes out under his breathe.

He has so much more that he wants to say, but everything hurts too badly for him to process any of it. He feels like his entire world is shattering, and all he wants is to curl up next to Matty and do whatever he can to make this right. It's too late for that though, he's fucked up, and the best thing he can do from Matty now is to stay away from him.

~~~

Matty has no idea what time it is when he regains consciousness, or even where he is. Everything feels like a dream. A fog is surrounding him, one that makes everything appear slow and fuzzy. Stars burst behind his closed eyelids, but in a pleasant way, their light and warmth keeping him company in the darkness that frames them.

He's tempted to sink back into unconsciousness, to embrace the comfort it is attempting to provide for as long as he can. Reality can wait a little bit longer, but at the same time, an insistent tugging sensation begs him to break out of the enticing warmth that is trying to drag him back down into slumber.

The first thing that registers is the soreness of his body, the ache in his lower back being prominent among them. His nerves are a conduit for pain each time he shifts, so he quickly stops attempting to move in the hopes of avoiding aggravating them any further.

Matty suddenly remembers what had occurred earlier - how George had fucked him just like he'd begged him too, of how good it had felt...how right it had seemed for him to submit to all of George's demands. Matty had never wanted it to end, in fact, he barely remembers the conclusion of their union, but it's obviously over now giving the fact that George is nowhere to be seen.

Secondly, he realizes that he's not alone, but the person with him isn't the one that should be here. There is someone in the other bed, he's certain of that, but it's not George. George doesn't breathe in that pattern, and that's not the sound his exhale makes.

Matty hates that he knows that, but he's too shaken up to berate himself for it at the moment. He wants George - he needs him. Everything inside of him cries out for the younger man with a passionate longing that Matty can't explain, but that doesn't change his desire.