My Mind

Is A Broken Mind

I am now in a bed, surprised it's not my car and there's a girl sleeping next to me. I doubt we did anything because I'm still wearing my pants, but my shirt is off.

We probably just made out, it looks like she's wearing a shirt, I feel like I remember this shirt, I don't know why. Maybe I saw it at the party.

I decide on not waking her, who knows how she'd react being in a bed with a stranger?

This is Stokeley's house, I get out of the bed and walk down to the kitchen, there's a random naked girl laying on the floor, her hair is sprawled all over her face. She looks bruised but I think she might've just fallen, completely naked.

I walk past her and get a glass of water, another party went by and I still feel nothing. It's like my mind is a blank canvas, no matter how many colours are thrown onto it, it will stay empty.

Stokeley stumbles down the stairs, groaning while rubbing his eyes "Ah shit what time is it?" He asks, noticing the girl on the floor, I look over to the clock "9am" I say, he doesn't look away from her.

"Should I wake her up?" He asks "Maybe she'd rather that, than you staring her unconscious naked body" I say, he shrugs and goes to sit on his couch, ok then.

I've never really been fine with myself, when I was 7, my mom.. let's just say she was terrible, hated me. Possibly herself, she spent most over her days in the clouds while being so drunk she can't even remember how to count.

This affected me, I didn't know what do to, I was young and I had a woman, hurting me both mentally and physically, she said it was because I deserved it, and u didn't know how to behave.

"Hello?" A girl stands infront of me says, snapping me out of my zone. She's the girl that was in the bed "Oh hi" I say "Um, I don't know my way home from here, could you possibly take me?" She asks, her shoulders elevating on her last sentence.

I nod and lead her out to my car, I grab my keys and we both sit in it. She crosses her arms over her chest and stares out the window, her eyes follow the butterfly tottering around.

I start the car, I was gonna ask her where she lives but I didn't want her to look away, she looks beautiful, as if there should be a halo over her head.

She loses sight of the butterfly and looks to me, realising I'm staring right at her. I clear my throat and look away "I live in ### ####" She says, and I type that into my phone, letting it navigate me to her house.

She doesn't live far from here anyways, but I was fine with driving her.

We reach her house and she gets out the car, she was about the close the door but before she did she pops her head back in the car "Oh and thanks for the ride" She displays a small smile.

She closes the door and walks in, all that and I didn't even get a name, am I fucking stupid?

She looks back at me before walking in her house and she smiles, the she closes the door, I'm just gonna call her Butterfly Girl.

I drive away and to my house, I don't really have anyone to greet me, I have my grandma who's always working. I'm an only child, I guess my mom saw me and decided that was it.

I go to my room and brush my teeth, whenever I look in the mirror, I'm always taken aback because I'm reminded that I look like that, I don't hate my face I just wish I didn't have it.

I go downstairs feeling sick at the sight of food, I'm always like this when I'm hungover. Food just looks repulsive and the only thing I want to do it drown myself in more alcohol.

2