Bechloe - You Can Depend On Me

Chapter VI

"AH!"

Beca jolted awake when she heard a high-pitched scream coming from Chloe's room. Beca flew out of bed, grabbed her gun from her bedside drawer, and raced across the hall into the redhead's room to find Chloe sitting upright panting and sweating.

"Chloe? Are you okay?" Beca said, turning on the light and inspecting the room.

"I... I'm fine..." Chloe breathed. "I just... I had a nightmare that's all..."

"Oh..." Beca lowered her gun and turned the safety on. "Are you okay?"

"This isn't the first time I've woken up like this. I... I've had trouble sleeping since that night."

"I... I'm sorry. It's not easy the first time."

"When was the first time you saw someone die?" Chloe looked up at Beca vulnerably.

"My first mission actually. I was doing a drug bust and it went bad and we had to go into the warehouse for backup. A lot of people died. It was messy and scary but we did the job."

"Does it get easier?"

"Depends on how you handle it. For me, I was forced to handle it. The best piece of advice I can give you is to try not to dwell on it. I know that it's always there and it's all you can think about but don't let it consume you. It's a slippery slope from there and trust me, I know what I'm talking about."

Chloe nodded then wiped her brow. "Thank you, Beca. Sorry for waking you."

"No, that's fine. This is my job, remember?"

"Of course," she chuckled.

"Are you alright for me to head back to bed?"

"Yes," Chloe nodded.

"Thank you." Beca turned around and made her way to the door.

"Actually, Beca?" Chloe spoke.

Beca stopped and turned to the redhead. "Yes?"

"I know this is a lot to ask and I understand if you say no but... would you mind sleeping with me tonight? I don't want to sleep alone tonight. Not after that nightmare..."

Beca was shocked but the way Chloe was looking so vulnerable and desperate... the brunette couldn't find it in her to say no. Besides, she was just sleeping next to her so Chloe felt safe and keeping her safe was Beca's job so what's the harm, right?

"Sure," Beca nodded.

"Thank you," Chloe sighed with relief. "Thank you."

Chloe scooted over, allowing Beca room into her queen-sized bed. Beca slid in next to Chloe and got comfortable under the sheets. Chloe did the same and she instantly felt better with Beca by her side.

"Hey, Beca?" Chloe asked after a little while.

"Yeah?"

"How do you deal with nightmares?"

"You don't," Beca uttered. "You just learn to live with them."

"Oh..."

"Did... did you want to talk about it?"

Beca never offered to talk about things with people. Beca was always closed off to others, even those who she was close with. The only person she ever got comfortable with was Jesse but he wasn't around any more. Beca talked to Emily but she still didn't feel comfortable opening up to her girlfriend. Beca was always like that though. It wasn't anything personal, it's just who she was but Chloe... she was different somehow. Beca hadn't known the woman for long but there was something different about her that Beca couldn't put her finger on.

"I can't stop thinking about it..." Chloe began. "Every time I close my eyes I see it. I hear it. I can even remember the smell. I wish I could forget about it but I just can't... It's with me all the time and I feel so different. I don't even feel like myself anymore. The whole thing was like an out of body experience. I... I can't even describe it properly."

"I get it."

Chloe turned her head so she looked at Beca and Beca did the same.

"I do. I felt that way my first time and my second time and my third. I sometimes still get that feeling. It's not nice, I know, but it'll go. Soon, it'll just be a memory. As awful as it is, it'll be a memory. I know it feels as if you're re-living that experience every day but it won't always be that way. You've just got to push on and not focus on it. Do you blame yourself?"

"No," Chloe shook her head, looking back up at the ceiling as did Beca. "I just wish it didn't happen."

"I know you do and as strange as it sounds, it was good that you saw it. You identified Walp and now we have a reason to arrest him. We have evidence and a testimony. All we've got to do is find him and bring him in then, we can crush his evil drug ring..." Beca hissed the last part.

"You get really angry when you talk about him... Is there more to him or something?"

Beca sighed. "Let's just say he killed someone I cared about. That's all you need to know."

"Oh... I... I'm sorry."

"That's okay. I'm sorry that you had to witness your boss's murder. Were you close to him?"

"We got along but we weren't close per se. He was good to me and he always treated me and the other dancers right. He wasn't a pig of an owner unlike some of the other club owners around the city. He was a good guy, as good as strip club owners go anyway."

"It still would have been hard."

"Of course. It still would have been hard if he were a complete stranger to me. I never thought I'd see someone's brains get blown out. I never wanted to. I just... I just don't understand how someone could do that. How can you kill another human being in cold blood? Where is their conscious?"

"They have none. That's why they do what they do. There are a lot of scumbags out there, Chloe, and it's my job to make sure they don't last long."

"Have you killed people?"

Beca simply nodded.

"Do you ever wonder if that makes you any different from them? Or better?"

Beca looked at Chloe briefly before looking back up at the ceiling. "Different, but not better."

Chloe nodded and was silent for a little while before she rolled onto her side.

"Goodnight, Beca. Thank you for sleeping next to me."

Beca looked at Chloe's back and noted just how beautiful and red her hair was.

"Goodnight, Chloe, and you're welcome."

Beca closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.