"Hey guys! It’s me, Deadlox. So, instead of a normal video today I wanted to-“
I sniff, and stop the recording for the 18th time.
"Just start the friggin' video Ty!" his voice echoed in my head.
I have to finish this video.
It’ll be the last they see anyway, so I have to make it perfect.
"Hey guys! It’s me Deadlox. So, today instead of a normal video I wanted to give you guys something else. I know I haven't gave you guys a video, an update, or any proof that I’m alive. So here I am. And this is my confession video. So... let’s do dis."
I paused, trying to think of what I should say first.
“Well, I’ve been gone for a while as you know, and that’s because I got kicked off of team crafted, just like Seto. Because, I’m different, I guess? I honestly don’t know what I did wrong... the only thing different about Seto and my situation is that no one from team crafted stood up for me."
I stop, because I’m on a roll, but also on the edge of crying. So I sit there for a minute, breathing deeply.
"You guys- my dead army, have been the only thing I stayed on YouTube for. So thanks for that. Uhm... being kicked off of team crafted, and losing my girlfriend within the same week has had a big effect on me. I felt like I wasn’t good enough for anybody, and should just leave them alone. So your comments really helped me out. I turned off the computer for a few months and sat around doing nothing. I understand this at first will be a Christmas present, since it’s almost Christmas. But at the end of this video I’m pretty sure it won’t be that great. That part was more for team crafted. So…here’s your guy’s part..."
my phone dings becaue i got a text, and i know what im about to see.
'just kill yourself already. see if anyone will miss you.' one anonomous person from team crafted wont stop this. i mean, no one else knows my number. plus, they said i was out of team crafted. who would say that as a prank...?
“As long as I can remember, my family hated me. I guess that was because I was bisexual. Anyways, they were slightly abusive and when they were pissed they would hold me down, hurt me, pressure point me or something like that. Then when I was in my first year of middle school, I was more bullied than usual. That… tha-… that is when I started cutting… I was in a lot of pain. But a few years later, I met Sky. he, at the time was my savior. I never stopped… you know, but I coped much better with life. But now, I wish I never grew so attached. Sky voted me of team crafted. And that hurt more than any blade, dull or sharp, can do. I still want you guys to watch team crafted, please don’t hate on them. Hate on me, if anyone. At first I feared that no one would save me, and now I know. No body, can save me...”
i text them back: 'im going.'
"I don't have much else to say, except things that are to personal to even think about."
'you took to long.'
"so, uhm... this was Deadlox's suicide video, and thanks for watching."
