Going In Blind (Edited)

Chapter Ten

I turn my attention back towards the great tree, taking in every inch of it. I had a theory, but I was afraid to test it. So instead, I memorize the tree. If Eywa does take me, she deserves to see the world as I do, all of the beauty she has created.

In the corner of my eye, I notice that Tsu'tey is studying me, a look of confusion on his face. His bright yellow eyes are narrowed, his lips pursed. Something is bothering him. Perhaps it's how I don't go pray to Eywa. Or, perhaps he's trying to talk me out of doing the test.

Too busy studying him, and not really paying attention, I fail to notice Mo'at standing a few feet away, watching us. Tsu'tey's eyes meet mine, and I hold his gaze. Tilting my head, trying to figure out what to do next, I finally spot Mo'at in the background.

"I see you Mo'at." I greet, smiling. Mo'at has become my second mother, in a sense. She greets me in return, and walks up to us.

"It is time, Kita." I take a deep breath, and look back at Tsu'tey, whose face has returned to his normal stone look. Telling Txur to go at a slow pace, Tsu'tey and I follow Mo'at back to Home Tree, where my fate will be decided.

At Home Tree, everyone was there, as well as Grace and Norm. Tsu'tey leads me to an area away from the commons, where Neytiri is putting paint on Jake's body. Tsu'tey grabs a bowl, and starts to do the same to me. I try not to think of the way his fingers brush against my skin with every stroke, or how his gaze lingers on mine for just a tiny bit longer than normal.

"In the Dream Hunt, an animal will come to you with a vision. That is your spirit animal."

"How will I know? What if there are many animals?" I ask him, starting to get scared.

"You will know. Just like you know to breathe."

He takes a look at his art, and with a nod, leads me out to the rest of the people, where Jake and Neytiri wait.

Grace moves to follow us down into the deepest layer of the tree, but another Hunter, Atan, stops her.

As we descend, I grasp Tsu'tey's hand, my fear overwhelming as it gets darker. I do not want to die in the dark. His fingers entwine between mine, comforting me just enough to continue walking.

Suddenly, there's a dull light, and the area opens up, revealing a circle of seated elders and hunters. A lone Elder beats a water drum, the noise flowing through me like a calm river.

Mo'at is preparing a bunch of items with graceful speed. She comes over to Jake and I, with a bunch of herbs burning at the ends. She purifies us with the smoke as we rub it over ourselves, making sure it reaches everywhere. When she's done, she passes the herbs to another hunter, and grabs a piece of wood that's riddled with holes. Unwrapping it, she grabs two glowing purple worms, and draws it out of the wood.

"Oh wise worm, eater of the Sacred Tree - bless these worthy Hunters with a true vision." She puts a worm in each of our mouths, directly on our tongues. I can feel the worm crawl in on itself as I close my mouth. She gestures for us to chew, which we do. I try as hard as possible to not spit it out, the taste foul.

Suddenly, something sharp presses itself into my neck, much like a needle. Mo'at steps back, Eytukan along with her, leaving Jake and I in the center of the circle.

I seek Tsu'tey's eyes, and when I find them, I hold their gaze. I remember him calling me strong and brave. I remember how honest he was, and how the Omaticaya didn't even know what a lie was until Grace taught them.

I keep those thoughts in my mind as everything begins to look weird. There's a low chant, that makes me want to fall asleep. The face that I have grown to care for starts to change, it morphs into something out of a nightmare until suddenly, I'm alone. Surrounded by tall trees.

I look down at myself, my body morphing into a tree. I don't feel anything at all.

When I look up, hundreds of Ikran's are flying overhead, fighting the human's helicopters. Time seems to rush forward, everything playing quickly. I see one of the people, the Na'vi, falling from a great height, right towards me.

As I watch, I want to scream out, but no sound leaves. It's Tsu'tey. He won't survive a fall from that high. I want to move, but my body is frozen.

Suddenly, I see it. The creature that helped me get to where I am. The Thanator. He walks right up to me, growling. But the moment he reaches me, the scene changes.

I'm on the Thanator now, just staring at the scene in front of me. Tsu'tey is on the ground, dying. I try to get off the Thanator, but once again I cannot move. The forest around me is on fire, the heat almost unbearable.

The Thanator roars loudly, and suddenly the vision is gone and I'm on the ground, my body sore, my head pounding.

"It is finished." Mo'at says. I roll myself onto my side, and sit up slowly, hissing from the pain. I see Jake beside me, almost back to normal. He must have finished before I did.

"Did you find your spirit Animal?" Eytukan asks.

I nod my head slowly. "Palulukan." I whisper, unable to believe it. The name literally means Dry mouth bringer of fear.

Tsu'tey, Mo'at, Neytiri, and Eytukan gasp in shock, followed by the other Omaticaya in the room. I know the stories. The last person to have the Thanator as their spirit animal, was the one to grow the Tree of Souls after the previous one had died. They had such a connection to the plants and animals that they could walk up to any of them in the wild, and make a bond with them. Except, their own spirit animal. The Thanator has not been bonded with for generations. The last time one had bonded, had been the last Toruk Makto.

The fact that Jake looks conflicted, and from what I know of my own spirit animal, it tells me that a great war is coming.

A war that will cost me Tsu'tey, the first man I have ever loved.

Mo'at looks at me with such a sadness that it overwhelms me, causing tears to fill my eyes. She walks to me, and presses her hands to my head.

"It will take time for the meaning to be clear." She tells everyone. They all nod and began to leave, Eytukan taking Jake to the surface. Mo'at stays with me for a moment. "It was never meant to be Kita. I am sorry for the pain you will suffer." She pulls me into a hug before leading me up as well.

I meet Grace's eyes, relief and pride filling them. I can tell she wants to know what my spirit animal is, but there is no way I can show her without showing everyone else.

Eytukan walks up to Jake, and places his hands on his chest. "You are now a son of the Omaticaya. You are part of the People." He then turns to me and does the same. "You are now a daughter of the Omaticaya. You are part of the People."

Jake and I hold hands as the entire clan comes forward, hands on my shoulders and back. It continues until everyone is connected, filling my heart with happiness and pride.

I was finally where I belonged.

I am, and forever will be, Omaticaya.