The Despairing Tribulations of a Doomed Boy

Chapter 9

Monday

Pieter sat alone for all his meals. "He ostracized himself," Ellsworth explained at lunch on Monday. "He wouldn't let any of us near him. Some of the other residents have tried befriending him and Rémy tries to befriend everyone, but he won't come around."

"Maybe I can talk to him," Otto said, feeling brave.

Ellsworth didn't object, but gave him an incredulous look. "If you want to try," he said and began heading in that direction.

"Maybe I should go alone," Otto said.

Ellsworth shrugged. "I'll be over there, then." He nodded towards their regular place and parted from Otto.

Otto stood frozen for a short while, wondering how to go about this. It was different then cheering up Lancret. This man was older than Otto. And Otto knew nothing about him. But he felt a sort of kinship with Pieter. And after what Nurse Vickers had told him last night, he didn't feel like putting on a smile for the others. Suffering with Pieter sounded a lot better. So he sucked in two lungs full of courage and forced himself to sit down next to the stranger.

Pieter eyed him without moving his head.

"I know how you feel," Otto began. This got a sarcastic snort. "Well, maybe I don't really. But I feel like I do. I've been hiding my whole life. It's not that much better than being locked in here. We were constantly afraid of being found out."

Pieter looked like he was brewing something dark inside of him. He answered in a tone lathered in contempt. "I know you rogues. You all come through here every so often. You're in and out in a few months. Either to prison or to become a weaponized button like the others. You'll be out of here in a month or two and I'll still be here. I'll always be here."

"Maybe not." Otto tried to instill a sense of hope into the conversation.

"Of course, I will. There's no use for a button that doesn't do anything. And nobody trusts a button that doesn't do anything. They'll never let me out; can't punish me; can't use me. I'm useless."

Otto was confused. Rogues becoming weaponized buttons? What did that mean for him? Detective Koi said he wouldn't be punished for being a rogue, but he was useless to the weaponized buttons as well. "I might be stuck here with you, then," he said, a little defeated.

Pieter looked up at him for the first time. "Why?"

"My nose-button is useless to them, too."

"It doesn't do anything?" Pieter's posture lifted with the hope of finding someone like him.

"No, it does something... just," he paused, "not something useful."

"What does it do?"

"I don't know if I'm supposed to tell you"

"I told you mine."

"Yeah..."

They stared at each other.

"I don't think I'm supposed to tell."

"Whatever. You rogues are all alike. You think you're better than the rest." And with that, Pieter turned himself away from Otto. The conversation was over.

Otto didn't want to move tables. He still felt sick and listening to Fran's ramblings and Ellsworth's cheerfulness sounded painful. But now that Pieter had written him off, this table felt cold and threatening. Pieter exuded disdain like smoke from a smoldering fire. The longer Otto sat next to him, the more uncomfortable it became. So he picked up his food and returned to the table of rogues.