i've been debating this for a while. i got this idea from my friend mallory, malloryships , ad i've been wanting to do it but always had this anxiety that um idk that someone i knew was gonna find this and like "expose" me or some dumb shit like that. on this app i can cuss as much as i want and i don't really get "ignored" per say, since i'm speaking to no one in particular. plus, when i'm writing, i can cry freely without feeling like i have to cover it up or anything.
sooooo i'm gonna start this and it's just probably gonna be a bunch of rants, thoughts, and weird dreams if i'm feeling a little weird. but yeah, i'm gonna start this since my friends usually don't like to listen to me speak and they seem uncomfortable with me around. and most of the time, when people try to help me, i get scared and get very aggressive because idk i feel like they don't actually care. that they just feel guilty so i like to lie to them about how i feel so they don't ask.
there's only one person i talk to and i even feel like he doesn't care anymore. idk i'm weird but that's saved for the thoughts part. and at the top i'll probably like label what it is like for a rant, i'll probably put "rant//this bitch" or "thoughts//why tf" you know?
anyway, yeah. i'm going to start letting things off my chest instead of bottling it up. and ik for some this doesn't work but i think it could for me. since this is basically the equivalent to walking in up in the middle of a school assembly and yelling "i'm depressed and wanna die but don't worry, i have a reason."
i'm weird lol and most likely, no one will read this but atleast i know it's out there so yeah.
see ya!
