Caught in a landslide. No escape from reality.

5 (December 24th, 1975)

BRIAN'S POV

We all gathered in Roger's and Freddie's small flat to spend the evening together with some drinks, as it was too late to visit our families now on Christmas eve. It was actually already Christmas day, it was past twelve, but whatever.
I was really happy to be able to spend this usually 'magical' time of love with the love of my life - Roger. There was something special to it. I even had a present for him, which I would give him tomorrow.
My excitement about his possible reaction was barely endurable.
The only thing bothering me that evening - and yes, I was as brazenly to call him a 'thing' - was Paul Prenter, still considered one of our managers. Well, Freddie's personal manager by now, and much more than that, but at least he didn't have the right to order me around anymore.

"We should host a big party on New Year's Eve!" Freddie started planning, a few drinks in.
It was ridiculous, him sitting on Prenter's lap, a small plastic crown on his head, crested with mistletoes which was a 'present' from Paul.

Yes, Freddie surely knew how to have fun and make a fool out of himself. Especially when he was near that Prenter. Mary, his ex-girlfriend which he was still good friends with, had been so much better for him.
But he had chosen; he had clearly chosen the wrong life style by now. And I kind of wanted to tell him to change that and return to Mary, but I didn't dare to do that.
He was one of my best friends but it was his life and he was a grown-up, so there was nothing I could or wanted do to change his mindset.

"I don't think, that's a good idea, Fred..." I interrupted his mind flow as I laid my arm around Roger.
Seeing Prenter and Freddie being kitschy like that, made me want to give some affection to my boyfriend as well. Just so that he wouldn't feel left out.
Now, Roger started chuckling, as he was leaning against me, laying his head on my shoulder. "Why? Last time was great!" He defended Freddie and raised his gaze to look into my eyes.
I rolled my eyes. "The police had to come!"
"Yes, love, but just to celebrate with us!" Freddie snickered.
"No, to break it up!" I frowned and crossed my arms.
A smirk formed on Freddie's face and he swung one leg over the other one, just like a diva. "But they didn't!"
"You offered them tea, laced with pot!"
"Well, they didn't have to drink it, did they?"
"They didn't know it was laced with pot!" I gesticulated wildly, as Freddie didn't seem to get my point.
"Everyone could smell it" Roger stated and snorted.
"No! I- They-" I didn't really know what to say anymore and I just dropped my face into my hands and shook my head.

New Year's Eve would be a disaster this year. Just like last year and the year before last year.
I was not looking forward to it. Okay, maybe a little.

FREDDIE'S POV

The evening was calmer than I would have liked and there was one person missing: Deaky.
Initially, I had planned to spend Christmas eve with the band. With every band member. But Deaky seemed to be a little down after the concert. Maybe a little tired but certainly very sad.
He didn't even join us for our traditional after party in one of the local pubs.

Roger went into the kitchen to get some 'beers' from the fridge, but we all knew, after talking about the tea for the police men, he was going to get some weed which I was storing in a small - no actually it was a big - crack in the wall. The flat was very dilapidated after all.
Brian suspected what Roger was about to get, so he jumped up from the couch and followed him into the kitchen to talk it out of him, but of course, Roger didn't listen.
"I don't want to be your babysitter again, Roger!" I heard Brian complain.
Roger answered: "You don't have to. Prenter's not going to get any, so he can do that!"

The idea of calling Deaky came up in my mind. I couldn't stand the thought of him spending the evening alone.
"What are you thinking about, sweetheart?" I heard Paul ask in a sweet voice as he took my hand.
I blinked and looked at him. "Oh, nothing, really, darling. I was just wondering if I should call Deaky. He's probably home alone right now..."
Paul sighed and shook his head.
"No, no, no, Freddie. That's a bad idea."
"Why?"
"Don't you think there's a reason why he decided to go home? He's probably fed up with all of you."
Paul took out his cigarette pack and offered me one. I shook my head. "No, thanks, love. I'm going to wait for the weed."
He lit one of the cigarettes and placed it in his mouth. "He went home because he is sick of that lifestyle, probably."
"But he's never said anything about that..."
"When did he last tell you anything, Freddie? He never talks, so what do you expect? He probably hates all of us anyways."
"That's not true... We are very good friends."
Paul's eyes widened, as he took a pull on the cigarette. He nodded. "Yes, that's what he wants you to think! He's just doing all this for the money, can't you see that?"
I frowned and shook my head. "Bollocks. He's such a humble and genuine person, he would never do that!" I moved away from Paul's lap and let myself fall onto the seat next to him.
Paul sighed. He leaned in a little closer and started whispering: "Oh, Freddie. You're so naive... Just think about it: he doesn't really talk, he starts arguments with the others, he doesn't participate in parties or get togethers... He just wants to stay close to you, because you're the most important member; the front man. And He knows that the band wouldn't be anywhere without you."
He leaned back into his seat again.
"He's just in for the money. He wasn't even there when you founded the band. He's just a parasite, exploiting the band's success. A great liar."
"Paul, that's bullshit!" Now, my face got angry.
What was he even talking about?
Deaky was a good and sweet person.
He even volunteered to take over all our financial matters.
Wait...

"Think about it, Freddie. I'm not saying that you should kick him out or anything. No, he's good, I know that. Just don't crawl after him like you depend on him. Because he depends on you."
He took a sip of his beer.
"You're too nice to people, Freddie. Not everyone you think is a good person, is one. I just want to protect you."

Maybe Paul was right. He was my manager and my boyfriend after all and I trusted him. But I also trusted Deaky, I had known the bassist for longer than I had known Paul.
That evening, I decided not to call Deaky.