Faith

He Loves Me

Displaced,

Alone,

Unsure of who I am,

I sit

And write

Of the lives

Of others,

Real

Or imaginary,

It matters not.

Tell myself enough

That I'm alright,

That I'm strong

And believe

That makes it true.

Or,

If it does not,

At least

I pretend.

I plaster a smile

Strong,

To my face

And greet people

In a normal manner

But I know,

Beneath the surface

Lie oceans of tears,

Longing

To break through

A barrier

Now struggling

To stand.

Seeing life

Through tainted eyes

Was never

My intention.

It is my battle

Not to become

A product

Of my environment,

That causes me

To act this way.

I distance myself

From people

And possibilities

And let few in.

Those

Who break past

My outer defences

Will still never

Realise

The truly dark

And sickening thoughts

That lurk

Within me.

Everywhere I look

I see possibility

For an ending,

A way out.

I do nothing though,

I now have counsel

In dark times.

There is one

Who has seen

My head

And heart

And loves me

Regardless.

He is ever present

To take my thanks

Or my abuse

And will never desert me

No matter

What I say

Or think.

He doesn't try

To speak back

Or offer advice

Or opinion

On the situation

In which

I find myself

But listens

Continuously

And unconditionally,

Getting little thanks

For his efforts.

He is my voice

Through the darkness.

He is my rope

To pull me back

As I dangle,

Precariously

Over a cliff's edge.

He is my one true constant,

Never to leave

Or hurt me.

How lucky am I

To have a God

Who loves me!