I might end up taking a break for a while. I am stressed with school and a musical that I'm in. My anxiety as started getting worse, and I need a break for a bit. I'll post as often as I can, and I will definitely post on the weekends because I don't have play rehearsal on that day. I just need to take care of my mental health as well as do all of this.
Okay, after every line that's from the song, it switches between Harry and Draco's POV. Just so you know.
(***TRIGGER WARNING***: SELF HARM AND DEPRESSION WARNING! IF YOU ARE EASILY DISTURBED BY THIS KIND OF THING, THEN PLEASE SKIP THIS CHAPTER! THANK YOU!)
Ever since I could remember, everything inside of me just wanted to fit in...
Draco shoved Harry and chuckled. Harry stood up and glared over at him. Hermione and Ron ran up to him.
"Oh my god, Harry, are you okay?" Hermione asked. Harry nodded.
"Yeah, I'm fine. It's just Draco, I'm used to it." Harry said. Ron shrugged.
I was never one for pretenders, everything I tried to be just wouldn't settle in.
Draco turned away and stopped laughing. He hated pretending to hate Harry. But if he suddenly stopped, people would be suspicious and know something's up. But Harry... Harry would be the most confused out of all of them.
If I told you what I was, would you turn your back on me?
Harry looked down at the ground as he made his way to the Forbidden forest to take a breather. He hated himself for liking Draco, and he hated pretending to hate him. He didn't want to tell anyone that he liked Draco, because he was scared that his friends would turn away from him and never talk to him again. So, he kept it a secret.
And if I seemed dangerous, would you be scared?
Draco was always trying to scare Harry by pretending to be dangerous. The point in this is so that Harry would stay away so that he couldn't gain more feelings for him. He wanted to get back to how he used to be. He wanted to go back to not having feelings for anyone. To be "normal".
I get the feeling just because, everything I touch isn't dark enough if the problem lies in me.
Harry felt like everything he touched got messed up, but god, his feelings for Draco wouldn't go away. How come he messed everything up except the one thing that he wanted to go away?
Harry slumped down on a tree and looked up at the sky. He smiled slightly and looked back at the ground.
I'm only a man with a chamber who's got me.
Draco walked around the school, thinking about every rude thing he has ever done to Harry. He hated feeling like he was trapped. He didn't know what to do with his feelings for Harry, and he was fucking everything up because of it. He was hurting Harry and making himself hate himself. He needed to tell Harry sometime, and sometime soon.
I'm taking a stand to escape what's inside me.
As he was looking at the ground, he noticed broken glass all around him. He needed to stop all of this pain. He needed to be free. He slowly lowered the sharp shard of glass down to his arm, and made a deep cut. He took a deep breath and did it again. He did this about ten times before he finally put it back on the ground.
He looked down at his now blood-covered arm and felt a pang of guilt, and he started sobbing.
A monster, a monster! I've turned into a monster!
Draco felt horrible for everything that he's done to Harry. 'You're a monster!' he thought to himself in the mirror when he was in the bathroom. He punched the mirror and caused it to shatter into millions of tiny pieces. He looked down at what he had done and at his bloodied fist. Then it hit him: he really is a monster.
