I'm Only Me When I'm With You

     He tried to look behind him to see the damage that was done, and then I don't even know what happened.  We looked up at each other at the same time and stared into each others eyes getting caught up in the deep.  That was when I noticed the exact position we where in.  I had my arms around his neck and he had his on my waist.  I felt a tinny spark, like lightning and then as if shocked, we both stood up and brushed the sand off each other.  The three off us looked at the sand castle and started laughing.  With extra help from Nick we got the castle to be as tall  as our mothers. 

     And that was how Luke and I became best friends.  Since then we have been to the same school and all the same classes.  We where attached to the hip.  I still have pictures from that day being covered in the sand to body boarding in the water.  Nick was there more than Kim as we got older since she was twice our age, but she was always there for me and one of my best friends.  She was the one that I could talk girl things with if my mom was not home but it did not matter how hard we tried to talk in private, Luke seemed to find a way to know everything we said.  So therefore he knows everything about me, and yes all the girl things too, like puberty.

     Anyways, our parents finally bought a beach house at Montage and as a "family" all eight of us spent every summer there since I was ten.  And now to think that summer is almost over just pains me.  I have this weird connection with the place.  It's like a second home for me, actually whenever I need time to myself away from home this is where I go, and then Luke eventually finds me...every single time.  We had just finished our junior year in high school and we are about to start senior year.  We have exactly two weeks and a half left.  I'm just happy that Junior year is done, because when they say it is the hardest year, well you've got the truth coming out right there.  

     It was getting late, around four o'clock and I had just suggested that the boys and I pack up to get back for dinner.  All of a sudden Luke picks me up in a firemen's position and starts running towards the water.  "Oh No!, No way.  Luke I will personally hurt you if you dare even think about what you are about to do."  I could see he was thinking about it for a second and then continued to run into the water, dunking me.  I was beyond mad now.  Now that I was completely wet in my clothes I had no time to dry off and now I'm going to get a rash from the sand.  I spring me heard up out of the water as fast as I can and see Luke back at shore.  Oooooh, he is so getting it.

     I started to walk back to our spot, picked up my stuff and walked away to the beach house.   I was not going to let Luke get to me.  "Awwww, come on Ella Bear, it was only just a little bit of water.  It can't hurt you, and just admit you, you had fun.  You did not even go in all day, I know you like it."  His comment just irritated me even more, but I was not what so ever going to fall under his spell.  I continued to walk up the last steps and ignored his words and dropped my stuff in my room and ran for a heads start for a shower.

     I just contemplated with myself throughout the shower.   It's one of the only things that can get me calm right away, the only place besides my room  that can let me be myself while being by myself.  After I was done mentally talking, I changed into shorts and my superman shirt.  As I was walking down the stairs a heat wave passed.  "Guys! Close all the windows and put the A/C on.  I don't know why it's still this hot and only five o'clock."  I turned the corner into the kitchen and Luke popped his head around and put his finger to his lips telling me to shush since he was on the phone.   I slowly backed away and saw Nick sitting on his butt watching some show on the television.  "Dude did I not just say to close all the windows, it's hot.  Your practically sweating all over the couch, get up!" 

     "Why should I be the one to do it, you go."  He was not working with me here.  "Okay, how 'bout you close the windows up stairs and I'll do the ones down stair and start the A/C.  Deal?"  He just stared at the television more, caring about what he was watching.  I walked over and pulled the plug and tried to keep calm as he was yelling at me, complaining for pulling the plug out saying that it was his life, blah, blah, blah.  "Fine." He said, " I'll go do the ones up stairs but you are putting that back together."  "Yeah, yeah, just do what I told you to do."  I do not know why I have any reason to baby them, they are worse then children. 

     Once the A/C started going we walked into the kitchen to start dinner.  I pulled out the left over pizza knowing the boys would eat that and made myself a couple tacos.  Our parents are very generous in making sure that the beach house was supplied with food that did not expire, because one year the boys hid some kind of junk in the back of the fridge for a whole year and the house started to spell and then our parents made us clean everything and that's how Kim and I found the boys sleeping on the porch and therefore we started another prank.  After I made Nick clean off his sweat from the couch we sat there eating our dinner, so much for a BBQ.  I turned to Luke and said "So what was that phone call so important about that you had to shush me?"  I could see that he was mentally battling with himself.  "Luke just tell me it can't be that bad, right."  He took a deep breath before he spilled the beans.

     "Well you know how Nick is going away to college this weekend and Dad has no one to help accompany him for the business trip for the restaurant."  He paused,  "Go on"  I encouraged.  "Well, he asked me to go."  "Well that's great Luke, I know you always wanted to get a look at the business."  He was not looking at me.  I grabbed his chin in my hand and said " There's more to it, isin't there?"  He sighed before saying "  He wants me to go the two weeks we have left before school stats again and I know we have not been apart ever and I don't want to leave you."  I know it would hurt me to see him gone but he is so cute that he is caring about me, I could not let him through his dream away for me.  " No, you will go to the conference and I will be fine.  I'm sure I will have plenty to do, i'll even call one of the girls to hang with if that makes you happy."  "Really, Ella Bear, you mean it.  You the best friend a friend could ask for, thanks."  And that's when I finally thought, that I was going to be lonely for the next two weeks because they both where going to be gone this weekend. 

     It was already Wednesday and I had done nothing.  I did not go out, didn't hang with friends, I didn't even go to the beach.  I was sitting on my bed watching some movie when my mom came in.  " You know, you should do something.  I do not want to see you turn into one of those girls who become anti-social and start becoming some kind of neet freak, you haven't even showered since he's been gone.  Can't you atleast do that because your room is starting to smell nasty."  "Ugh, fine. But I'm doing this shower for him, not you.  Hey, stop smiling like that, you know what I mean.  Gosh mom your such a creep." 

     After the shower I was once again laying on my bed doing nothing when all of a sudden my phone started ringing.  I picked it up and held it to my ears and heard the most wonderful sound in the world.  "Hey Ella Bear, I was just calling in to see how you were doing.  Sorry I have not been able to call sooner I just got so caught up in the business of things, but I'm here now, well I'm not really here as in there with you, but you know what I mean."  "Hahahahahahahahahahaha." I started to laugh so much, I missed him and the thought of him already making me laugh was amazing.   "I'm glad your having a good time." I told him.  "Yeah, it is really amazing here, I wish you could have come, I'll try and sneak you in my luggage the next time I go."  The next time, the next time.  What did he mean by that, did he seriously learn so much that he is going to start managing for his dad or something.  " It sounds like your learning a lot i'm truly happy for you."  " So, what have you been doing so far, I want to here all about it."  Hmmm, how to answer his question.  " Ella, Ella Ella!  Are you listening to me?  I'm guessing you have done nothing, I told you not to Wait on me, go have fun, if you do'nt I'm coming home."  "NO, no, no!  I'm listening do'nt come home I know you want this just stay."  "So you don't want me home?"  He started to chuckle.  "You know what I mean.  I promise I'll go do something once where done talking.  You know my mom made me take a shower, I was perfectly fine in my pj's eating junk food and flipping though channels."   "Awww, Ella bear did I make that effect on you?  Do you really miss me that much, because I do too don't worry, your the first thing I think about when I go to sleep and the last, and then it starts all over again in the morning."  "Oh shut-up!"  "Hahaha, Ok I've got to go but I promise I will be back soon, right before school starts ok, now go and spend the day shopping or something. I got to go, I love you, bye."  " I love you too, bye."  I whispered that last part as I hung up the phone.  I sighed really loud as I walked to the calender that hung on my wall.  " Only ten days left, ten days."