𝐢 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩 𝐦𝐲𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟

iii. THE CONFRONTATION

"I didn't mean to include you too.." Jonathan says and Icarus nods. "Okay. Gotta go now. Sorry about the camera." He says before walking away. "Not your fault." Jonathan calls out before he got into his own car. Icarus rolls his eyes before getting into his car as well and driving home.

When Icarus got hone, he first put away his stuff into his room and did his homework before deciding to listen to music for a while. He starts to think of Steve again and suddenly, his head starts to hurt. Je sits up when his mom walks in. "Hey mama.." He says as he turns down the volume.

"Your dad just got called into work.. They say they found a body at the Quarry." She says and he stands up. "Oh.." He says and she looks down. "Yeah. He says it might be that Byers kid.. He was in a hurry so supper will be late tonight, alright?" She says and he only nods. "Alright.. I have something to do anyway." He says and she smiles.

"Just be sure to be home in time." She says, softly touching his cheek. "Alright.." He says, nodding before she leaves the bedroom. When she left, Icarus grabbed his keys, the clothes Steve gave him which he shoves into his backpack before leaving the house and heading to Steve's place. When he parks outside the house, he sighs then he notices that Steve's parents were home so he comes up with an excuse to why he would even be here on a school night.

He puts on his hood to hide his hair before knocking on the door. The door opens to Steve Harrington's mom and he smiled. "Hi. I'm Icarus Blood and I'm here to see Steve. I'm his partner in.. Chemistry." He says and the woman smiled. "Hi. I'm Steve's mom, come on in, Icarus." She says.

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. Harrington." He says with a nod and she smiled kindly. "Steve!" She shouts and Steve appears at the top of the stairs. "What?" He says and Icarus looks up at him. "Your partner in Chemistry is here." She says before walking away. "Chemistry, huh?" Steve mumbled, coming down the stairs. "What do you want, Icarus?" He asked as he stopped in front of him, crossing his arms. Icarus sighed then reached into his already open. "Wanted to bring these back." He says before taking out the red tshirt and gray sweatpants.

"Right, thanks.." Steve says as he grabs the clothes then looks behind him. "Wanna talk upstairs?" He asked and before Icarus can respond, Steve is walking up the stairs, expecting the taller teen to follow behind. Icarus sighed but followed behind anyway. Upstairs in Steve's room, Icarus went through the night they shared together again as he shuts the door behind him. "What did you wanna talk about?" He asked and Steve sits down. "Um.." He said but then looked down, rubbing the back of his neck before setting the clothes down.

"I just wanted to clarify.. I don't know what was going through my mind—" "You don't need to explain yourself, Harrington.." Icarus says, staying by the door and Steve looks up. "No? Um.. But I thought that you.. hated me. And didn't ever want to talk to me for it ever again.." He says as he stood up. Icarus walks over as he is nodding his head. "Right. No. I don't and I do wanna talk to you, but not as friends. Or the other way. I just.. I wanna go back to being two classmates passing by each other in the halls." He says and Steve looks down.

"Yeah, yeah, no, I get it.." He says and Icarus looks at him. He raises his hand to Steve's face causing Steve to look up at him. "Harrington.. You have no idea how much I wish I'd love to let this carry on.. But I can't. I just can't.. Okay?" He says before pulling his hand away and Steve sighs. "Why?" He asked and Icarus looks down.

"You know fucking why, Harrington.." He says and Steve looks down again, rubbing his eyes. "What? Because of what others would think? I thought you were Icarus Blood. Doesn't care what others think. Fuck, your hair is long and you don't care that other people think it makes you look like a fucking chick." Steve says and Icarus sighs. "Leave my hair out of it, man.." He says and Steve scoffs.

"That's a whole different thing, alright? My hair is just the one thing I have control over. This? I don't know what the fuck it is.. I had no control when you kissed me. I couldn't stop myself.." He says and Steve steps closer. "Really?" He asked and Icarus pushed him away, but not roughly. "Yeah. Which is why this has to stop. You go back to being King Steve, go back to Nancy or whatever, I.. I go back to being the loner everyone is scared of just because he listens to metal." He says, then nodded.

"That's the way it's suppose to be.." He says and Steve sighs. "I want to try, but I know I can't get you to change your mind.. But you'll know sooner or later." He says and Icarus scoffs. "Know what?" He asked and Steve smiled. "We need each other. You'll figure it out. You wanna be with me and I wanna be with you. Only thing stopping us is everyone else in this awful world.. I'll give you time.." He says and Icarus sighs. "Whatever.. I gotta go."

When Icarus got home, he smoked a cigarette out on the porch swing as he stared at the ground, thinking of what Steve said to him. We need each other. It was right anyway. He needs Steve. He craves Steve. He wants him. He sighed as he scratched his nose, smoking his cigarette for a bit more before throwing his cigarette away and heading inside. He hears arguing in the kitchen so he walks over, standing right outside by the entryway.

"Icarus needs all of our attention right now, Matthew!" Mary shouts at her husband who sighed. "Icarus is perfectly fine, Mary. He is like any other teenager. Okay?" He says and she sighed, rubbing her face. "No. No. I refuse that. I think we need to cut his hair and buy him more colourful clothes.. We let this go on for far too long and now he's lying to us again?" She says and Icarus looks down. "We are not cutting our son's hair. Or getting him new clothes!" Matthew said and Mary sighed.

"Yes.. We are. Tomorrow night, you are cutting his hair.. And I'll go shopping for him. End of discussion.." She says then walks out, only to abruptly stop when she saw Icarus standing there, staring at the ground. "Baby.." She says and he looks up. "Fuck off." He spat then ran up the stairs. "Hey!" Matthew shouted loudly and he stopped halfway up the stairs. "The clothes? Maybe... But not.. definitely not the hair." He says before continuing up the stairs and Mary looks at Matthew.

authors note watch icarus always call steve "harrington" and steve complain about it then one day he calls steve by his actual name and it will be becuz its an intimate moment <33 wow so excited,,, love that for my white bread boys 👊🏼😌

icarus getting his hair cut will actually hurt my heart & soul. like so much. i love long haired boys, i loved it when rich (from skins) (who also is the guy that potrays icarus) had long hair then it was fucking cut?? like what the fuck bro??

also here's a nice thought: oliver & elio banged the same year (1983) as steve and icarus did.
wow i love gay couples thriving in the 80's.