One Foot in the Grave: An Almost Zombie story

Chapter Thirty-Six: Experimentation is the Name of the Game

"Tucker, we need to see Nacelles." I face the revenant head-on. "Is he here?"

"You promised me steak." His voice is flat.

Crap. I had. "You're right," I say, "but I don't eat steak anymore and I forgot to buy some."

"You promised me steak." His eyes are fixed on Noelle. If he thinks I'm giving the half-fae to him instead he's mistaken.

"She is not food." I use his own terminology against him.

"You are 'not food'. She is alive."

"I'm Isis," I say, not so patiently. "She's my friend, and she's not on the menu." I shrug when Noelle glances at me. It's easier to call her a friend than to explain 'frenemie' to a corpse.

"I require food."

Boy, he really does have a one track mind.

"It's super important," I plea. "How about taking two steaks next time?" Bargaining like this makes me feel like Wimpy of the old Popeye cartoons. 'I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for...' Sheesh! I assume Tucker's thinking about it because he doesn't say anything. After a long and agonizing minute, he pulls the door to Nacelles' hallway open and gestures us inside.

I release the air I don't have to breathe anymore. Now all that's left is the ghouls. And I really hope they're not roaming the halls in search of their next meal.

A phalanx of glowing golden eyes greets us as soon as we step through the door. Noelle turns around immediately, but it's too late. Tucker's already bolted us in.

"They're the hell hounds," I whisper. It's weird, seeing row upon row of eyes without bodies. Before I can wonder if Maxx has that ability, too, a pair of eyes steps forward and blurs into a hound as massive as my friend.

"This is not your domain," it growls. "What are you doing here, half? You were not summoned."

"I need to see Nacelles Caldmer." I'm determined to keep my voice firm. If dogs can smell fear, does that mean the bigger the dog, the more fear it can smell? I sure hope not.

"You are not expected." Its voice is a lot deeper than Maxx's.

Yeah. We pretty much established that already. "This is kind of impromptu. Unplanned," I add, in case it doesn't understand me. I needn't worry.

It bares its teeth at me and I'm pretty sure it's not smiling. "I am not unaware of what the word means." It's a lot more formal than Maxx, and that's saying something. "I'm sorry," I apologize. "But it's important."

"I will take your request back to him," the giant beast says. "What is the nature of your visit?"

"Brains," Noelle says. "She needs to talk to the lich about brains."

The hound's nostrils flare. "You have no business here, half-fae. Our master does not deal with the living."

I'm shocked when Noelle stands her ground. I guess she's making an effort, too. "I'm here for Isis," she says.

The beast cocks its head to one side, as though it's listening to something neither Noelle nor I can hear. Then the rows of eyes begin to fade. "Follow me. I will take you to him."

"Did you just communicate telepathically with Nacelles? How cool is that!!"

The hell hound in question sneezes. Thanks to Maxx, I know exactly what that means.

"We're not going to run into any ghouls, are we?" I ask.

"Our master does not allow them to roam during the pack's time," it replies. "We do not get along well."